Allotments 4 All

it's quite tiring, actually.

and boooooooooohhhh, max :P

Got it!! She says pelting in, Derek, move that b***y Box!!!
Aiken, your bum looks soooo big that I think it has it's own atmoshere.... ::) ;)
Ady...thwack....in a puppy like manner..... :-*
OK, here it is the script

          CINDERELLA

Enter evil step mum and 2 ugly sister...

Ugly sister 1 - you're ugly
Ugly sister 2 - no, you're ugly
Step mum - You're both ugly...
Enter Cinderalla
Step mum - You're not ugly
Ugly sister 2  thwack Cinderella over the head with a brick.... ::)
Cinderella - ouch
Enter Genie
genie - Hey Cinders, babe, give me a rub and I'll give you your wish...
Enter Prince Charming
Prince Charming - Hey, you gorgeous chunk of womanhood, I'm having a ball
fancy a good time?
Cinderella - Ooo yup please
Lots of dancing and thigh slapping
Cinderella- Ooops!! Gotta dash
Prince Charming - I'll find you
Cinderella - O no I've dropped my cling film slipper!!
Prince Charming - No probs, I've got it!! Look it fits!! Fancy a shag?

         More thigh slapping and general merriment.........

                             The End!

Right, I'm off back to the pub.....

at 11:30am?? woman, it's a bit ealry, aint it?

so, who is cinderella, who is prince charming, and will redclanger get rubbed up the wrong way? all very intregueing

QuotePrince Charming - No probs, I've got it!! Look it fits!! Fancy a shag?

One for all the family then Lotster!!! ;D

Nope Svea!! ;D ;D ;D
Took me hours, that line....my poor little furrowed brow all wrinkled in concentration....

Hey UCP...So what songs are we playing/singing then?

Its all very well writing a few lines for the actors then sloping off to the pub...when do I get to wave me stick?????

Derek

and what happened to the whipping...and isn't there a pumkin somewhere?

...and how am I sposed to get all the way out of the broom cupboard to the stage to say a near first line in time....and have you thought about Svea?  She could bring her guns to keep things under control....seems a bit rowdy in that orchestra pit?  sure aintg tea brewing in the corner.......is that poteen?????

and, and, and...........

Love the script, a no speaking part for Buttons, which is just as well cos can barely talk at all today. Derek stop playing them drums in my head.

Lottie - get me a lager I'll be round in a minute, a bit hair of the dog might sort me out.

These temperamental impresario's do get carried away with them selves...what about the workers.

I shall have to brew up again...want a sticky bun Ice?

Derek

Right, come on Reedos....down the pub, whilst I rustle up whipping for Icy, score for Derek, lines for Buttons and pumpkins for Svea to hurl....
Enters tavern wearily....."  1 pint and 6 tequila slammers, please...."  ;D

What time is the mat in hay then

< ... I've just had a phonecall from the local Health and Safety Executive  ....Lottie has been declared a definite health risk ... they've cancelled the Panto ... and Toby Blair apparently doesn't approve of the word Pants  .....

N.B. That wasn't a mispelling btw  :P

They can't do that, my public'll be devastated >:(

Lottie, I'll get them in while you start the petition. Another jug of tequila ? And can you remember where I parked the pumpkin ???

Public,  did you say public!!!   LOTTIE!!!!!  What have you done!   I thought you said pubic were coming!   <sulk>  going to have to throw out that waxing kit now....  anyone want a Christmas present......{GG}

oh,  can someone taceh lottie to tpye wivout mkanig erorrs liek wot the rset of us do.. ;)  or she is to drunk already?????  Can't be doing with this wax thing  <mutter mutter> oh and another G&T please daaalling   :P

I seem to be the only refined person in all this. However, now I am seething!!! I gave up a lovely part in the panto so that I could be a kitchen worker and keep you all supplied with tea and currant buns. What do I find after me sweating over a boiling kettle Derek has the audacity to say there is a brew in the orchestra pit. I have sent a letter of complaint to the Actors Union.

Quite right Lorna. Disgraceful. And where is our so-called leader? In the boozer!!

But Lorna...I am entitled...I am a fully paid up member of the OPTMUSiC (Orchestra Pit Tea Makers Union Select(ion) Committee)

One lump or two  ;)  ;D

There's a chocolate eclair going spare.

Derek

Hic....hellooooo all...hic! Come up with one song....."I've got a lovely pair of coconuts..." am so chuffed...
Hey Lorna!! How's it going?!!? Hic...Ooops dropped me thingy, be back in bit.....bit thirsty..... ;D

will somebody please rub my spout - I am stuck and cannot get out!!!!!

Ooh poor Clang.  Rub rub, there you are dear  :)

Hi everyone.  How is it going in panto land?  Sorry been unable to join in as have been having real life panto of my own.  Have lost an  8 foot Crimble tree and burned my old mans' beer coupons.  Bum bum  ;D

What time does the curtain go up on this fiasc, er fine feast of hentertainment?  Lots, Lottie!  You there dear?  Looks behind curtain.  Blimey like the Marie Celeste behind ere.  Who's are all these guns and handcuffs?  Oh look a footspa and the bubbles are still warm.  How strange.  Cooee,... anybody there?  Hellllllloooooooooooo