Allotments 4 All

The kids and I always put a wreath on Charlies "plot". I cannot bare artificial flowers. I have in the past searched our area for wreaths without artificial flowers. I have to travel nearly 10 miles to get the sort I need.. Lorna jnr does like artificial flowers so her wreath has them on. If you remove the artificial flowers the wreath looks bare.. As I say What we prefer".

I was at the cemetery the other day and some of the wreaths are horrific.  The ones with candy pink flowers on.  Aaaaaaagh  ;D   I put fresh flowers on mum and dad's grave but they were freezing as I was doing it so don't think they'll last long  :(

Quite agree Wardy. We  also put fresh flowers on a weekly basis. In fact Donna(daughter-in-law) Lorna jnr and myself are the most regular visitors. In the end we more or less made a rota. We found we were perhaps all visiting on same day and not enough room in the vases!!Really cross with myself I forgot to take spring bulbs, left it a bit late but will still plant them this week. Hopefully they will come good for  following year.

OOh I am picking up our 3 wreaths tomorrow.  I think its an awful waste of money but do contribute.  I wish I was able to make my own really but hey wasnt blessed with patience to make them.  My Ma in law always said,  flowers for the living not the dead so she doesnt get a wreath from anyone.  Do I sound mean.   :-[ :-[ :-[ :-[

My mum and dad loved flowers and I'd feel I wasn't respecting them if I didn't keep fresh flowers on their grave.  Anyway my old ma would haunt me if I didn't  ;D   I like the wreaths but not with lurid plastic chrysanths on which is all that they have round here  ;D

Grandson Josh (10) sometimes ask if he can come to cemetery with me. Last time he came he said "Why are all those graves so scruffy? (The very old ones.) I explained that maybe people had moved away or families were no longer around. His answer was "No excuse Nan, when you and Mummy are no longer here I will still be here and then I will make sure my children look after the graves" Nice thoughts for a 10 year old.. Charlie also loved  flowers.

At least he knows where we end up, which sounds healthy. There's no use going through life denying the inevitable. 'There is nothing certain in this life save the leaving of it...'

My dad was cremated and his ashes 'planted' in the 'lawn of rememberance'.  At Christmas time we take my nan, his mum, and she takes a small festive arrangement to leave at the crem, and me......I send him a Christmas card with all of our news.....I do the same on the anniversary of his death, and his birthday.....strange gal me....I hide the card in different places around the cem or crem..... The only flowers we leave are 5 long stemmed red roses, one from each of the grandchildren...that is what we had on his coffin.  Family in Devon do wreaths for the graves...I dunno if I would want one, not that I would have much choice of course..... sorry.....I am tired, and a touch emotional....tis that time of year, so am nattering away.......... :-\

My mum hated wreaths and anything  to do with funeral flowers (she used to be a florist and made far too many of them, although she used to try and talk the customer into having a mixed sheath if it was a cremation as the flowers used to go in a skip to be shredded but the bouquets could be taken to the hospice)  We made and exeutive decision to forget the day she died, make no special arrangements for the book of rememberence etc and her birthday is treated like any other day.  We miss her every day so it makes no difference and she always said that she would hate it if anyone felt compelled to go out of their way to visit  her grave.

Having read the above posts that is why I put subject as  What we prefer. I honestly don't think there has been a day  that Charlies name hasn't been mentiones one way or another.

Exactly Lorna and if it helps to ease the pain then why not ?  My mum's mum died shortly before her and mum made it quite clear then what she would have wanted to be done if she died.  When I go I want my funeral / wake to fancy dress so that everyone is forced to look daft and not sombre in black.  It will just be a shame that I would not be able to join in as I would love to go as a pantomine cow.  ;D