Secondary school

[Borlotti]

My granddaughter has just started secondary school and loving it.  She has been away with a trip from the school and an induction course.  It is a large school and she is coping very well and getting excellent reports from teachers. Problem today my daughter came to my house in tears as she was told off for taking her to school and collecting her.  She can't drive so walks her to school, with one bus ride.  No-else seems to go her way so it would mean her walking alone.  If she meets friends on the way she goes with them and says goodbye to Mum.  Women from the Parenting Course said she was an over protective mum and holding her child back and may be they would get in touch with the school.  Other people pick up their children in cars, and when she has got used to school and the journey and the weather is better she can go on her own.  This silly women is going to inform the school that her development may be impeded for over anxious mum.  After the fact that the local paper had four cases of skirt lifting and a fatal stabbing in Edmonton last week I don't think she is being over protective.  I suppose I am an over protective grandma and I will take her and met her if Mum is not allowed.  It's a strange world when you are criticised for collecting your children.  Perhaps they would be better occupied protecting Baby P and interviewing of the parents that don't care.  The child loves being met and on-one laughs at her.

[Borlotti]

[betula]

I have never heard anything so ridiculous............I would tell her to go stuff herself   >:(

[sarah]

so would I.

[ACE]

I have never heard anything so ridiculous............I would tell her to go stuff herself   >:(

Yeh. what she says!

[Froglegs]

The lunatics are taking over the asylum if you ask me.

[1066]

Yup - wrong wrong wrong!
I know my neice was walked to secondary school for quite a while, then she got to a point where she asked us to walk her to near the school, and then eventually not at all (by then she had some friends going the same way). Each to their own I say, when your granddaughter is ready she'll let you know, and not when someone, who doesn't know her decide!

Besides who are these people "parenting course" ? What business do they have in all this (sorry for asking but never heard of it before)

[asbean]

Never heard such a load of claptrap in my life  :o :o :o :o :o :o :o

She know her daughter better than they do, when she's ready to go on her own her daughter will let her know.  All children are ready to do things at different times, the parents are the best judge of when.

Tell 'em to stuff their idiotic ideas. Grrrrr  >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(

[Squash64]

The world's gone mad!

There should be more mums like your daughter and less like the ones at the Parenting Course.

[I love digging]

I'd be inclined to get in touch with the school myself first, and report them for bullying tactics.  Such a load of rubbish - who do they think they are?  Clearly, don't care about their own children.

[Borlotti]

This lady runs the Parenting Course, don't know what her qualifications are, will have to find out, she is some kind of social worker so do have to listen to her point of view.  Thanks for your comments as thought everyone would say she is old enough to go on her own and we were over protective.

[SamLouise]

If this had been said to me, I'd have bitten my tongue with what I really wanted to reply and said something like, "with the greatest respect, I'd appreciate it if you left me to deal with how I look after my child, thanks" - definitely not what I'd want to be saying though!  How outrageous!!  I'm mad just reading it!  When my son started secondary school, I used to meet him at the bus stop because it was two bus rides away and I was nervous of him travelling/walking alone.  As he made friends who travelled the same way, I wittled it down to sitting on the bus but not with him until I was sure all was well and then I left him to it (but I was still always clock watching, lol) :)

[Borlotti]

Well, now I have calmed down can see the funny side of it, I hope.  Social services (Parenting Classes, whatever) connected to Edmonton (Baby P case) tells mother off in the street for taking child to school. It is Enfield, but Edmonton is the same area.  Must run in the family because I will probably be arrested for stealing cat that is left out all night on bonfire night and crying and head butting the cat flap. Apparently, and this is confidential, she told another mother off for walking her child to school through the park as she took the child and dog to school (was a nice walk).  Was told to let the child to go on its on and take the dog out later and she was being selfish and not considering the childs needs as she wanted to walk the dog.  (She also said she was going to check a family and may be taking the child away, not very confidential in the street). I have got brian damage, but am being very good and not ringing up and complaining as daughter knows what I am like when I lose my temper.  I suppose she is just trying to say at that age they have to be independent and not too realiant on Mum, but it has ruined my day, and I am so angry.

[asbean]

I don't blame you.  If it was me I would still have steam pouring from my nostrils.

What is wrong with taking the dog too?  Gives all the family "together" time.  Edmonton sounds like social services gone mad.

It is far better for a child to build up confidence at their own pace, and then become streetwise with confidence than to be walking home nervously because some half-@rsed social worker says the text book says they have to be able to do it at a certain stage in their development.

[thifasmom]

what the!!!

i have to agree this is bullying (i for one would be writing a very stern letter of complaint to her Superior stating my dissatisfaction). my daughter is in year five but since last year has wanted to walk to school on her own which i was more than happy with but her dad wasn't. she got her wish at the beginning of this school year but i still pick her up from school, it gives us time to catch up on the school day before we get home when its all go again with the two of them vying for my attention.

each parent and each child is unique in their needs as is each situation. that so call social worker has no right to tell your daughter when she is to stop or start walking her child home or to school that should be a family decision, end of!!!!!!!

[lorna]

Makes me want to say "I don't believe it" (Mildrew) as others have said pity that the poor mites who are abused, neglected etc aren't given such attention.

[grawrc]

It sounds to me as though she (the social worker) is the one who needs investigating!

[Sholls]

I'd be another telling Ms 'Parenting Tutor' to sod off! (And in less polite terms!) If your daughter has been instructed to attend the class then obviously she may want to moderate her language, but the message would be the same. ;)

How is she 'limiting' her child if, when your grand-daughter runs into her friends en-route to school, she lets her go with them? A sensible person could argue that your daughter is actually teaching her to be independent by taking her on foot & public transport; the girl is being exposed to many more weird & wonderful characters than she'd meet if she was driven to school & dropped at the gates.    

[SMP1704]

By and large SS are run by power crazed nutters who are only concerned with covering their own backs.

My recommendation is that your daughter listens, smiles and nods and then completely ignores Mrs Parenting - after all what is she going to do? get the CPS to bring a case for over protection.  I have never heard anything quite so bonkers.

If attendance at the parenting classes is voluntary then just stop going cos it's not helping...........

Also fuming with you................grrr >:(

[grannyjanny]

Our granddaughter also started high school this time. She lives about 3/4 of a mile from the school & our daughter takes her to the shops where she meets her friends & they walk the rest of the way together. GD is  loving the whole thing, her mum says she is living High School Musical.
Barlotti tell your daughter to keep up the good work, it's early days & she is only 11.

[Digeroo]

I think that this is bullying.  If this person had an issue with the conduct of a parent she had no business to upset a child about it.  She should have discussed it with the parent, since they were the one she believed to be at fault.

Do people who drive their children to school get the same treatment?

I think it is nice that your daughter takes her daughter to school.  Nice bonding time.  I used to take and collect my daughter at junior school but she went to senior school on the school bus and I really missed this time.  It will not be long before you daughter wants to be off on her own. 

I would check with the school to find out if they think that your child lacks independence.

I think that this affair will have a far greater negative effect on the child.  Independence will come, but the results of this bullying may not be grown out of.