not sure how I feel about this

[grannyjanny]

As the mum of a daughter with major fertility problems I think it's a truly wonderful gift & had I not had a hysterectomy I would have considered it myself.
Janet.

[grannyjanny]

[manicscousers]

wow, lots of different thoughts on this, I'll have to pass on cyber hugs, my nephew and, now I've thought about it, my wonderful niece-in-law, live in toronto..this is the interview with her and Tom, hope it works, maybe it'll help people see where she's coming from
http://podcast.cbc.ca/mp3/slc_20080211_4693.mp3

[posie]

Well listening to that she's obviously a very well grounded and extremely giving and caring person.  Not many people could be that selfless.  Hats off to her, you must be very proud.   :)

[Trevor_D]

Rant over.

Rant??? Reads like total common sense to me!

[Magnolia]

Thank you for sharing the podcast.  Wow!  What a wonderful, articulate, well grounded, amazing woman.

[Jeannine]

Three cheers Grawc, you took some of my  words right out of my mouth.

further more

Many of you know I have a gay son,in his late forties, he and his  life partner never did not choose to adopt a child but MANY of his friends did and I have been to many celebrations of their adoption, I can only remember one couple whose partnership went off and they stayed as joint custodians of their son.

I also know many single Mums who chose to have a child and reared it themselves, many are making a fabulous job, of  those that are not  many would have been struggling even with a partner.


I find the comments a bit strange and am wondering what kind of situation would Silly Billy find appropriate to rear a child in.

Very very few children have the benefit of a  " normal"  up bringing these days,

Gay, straight, single, married, divorced , remarried  or even mixed race our kids these days have seen it all, most have been involved with one or the other and they cope very well IF the adults around them are stable and honest.

That is my two cents worth.

XX Jeannine

[Trixiebelle]

Just listened to the interview Manics!

They both sound like a fabulous couple & I respect their decision to do this amazing thing for someone else  ;D Pass on my best wishes to them wontcha!

I actually considered being a surrogate mum for a gay couple I know. Still am as a matter of fact! But the circumstances were different (as they obviously are in every case) The distance involved between me & the couple is the deciding factor because I would still want to be a part of the baby's life - and we are best friends as well, so if I had the baby then we (the dad & me) would still be part of each other's lives.

Lots of love to you and your family Manics!

WOOLY-MINDED LIBERALS INDEED ACE  ;D

Trix XX

[Trixiebelle]

Didn't see your post before I typed mine Jeannine. XX I agree wholeheartedly!

[Jeannine]

Me too  with you Trix..me too. Good luck with your decision..ps ( I still have little quilts) Oh I am so bad!!XX Jeannine

[Trixiebelle]

YOU ARE TEMPTING ME WITH LITTLE QUILTS JEANNINE!!!

STOP IT!

[wizz]

Blimey... i joined this forum yesterday because I 'm about to get an allotment... never dreamed my first post would be on this.. but here goes... (sorry if i get slushy!)

I have had fertility problems. Whilst i ruled out using a surrogate myself, I believe that surrogates are very special people and take my hat off to them. 

We were very blessed to have our son at the 6th (and def the last!) IVF attempt. 19 months after his birth I still marvel at our good fortune. I had gone quite a long way down the road of accepting that we would not have children and whilst i would have never known about what i had missed - i still get a lump in my throat just thinking about the last 19 months.

It also happens that my sister is lesbian and with her partner adopted a little girl 6 months prior to my son's birth. To see the positive change and development of my neice over the past two years has been truely amazing.

We've both been very lucky to have become mums and basically just love it and (between the odd tantrum or two) thank our lucky stars that its happend !

Ok that's all i want to say really!

wizz

[Jeannine]

Good for YOU!! I too have a lump in my throat now.

You enjoy that baby sweetie, you have certainly earned it, and blooming well done to your sister too

Lucky stars are pretty neat eh!!

Welcome to the forum, as you can see we talk about all sorts apart from spuds!!

I shall look forward to hearing about your gardening excitements too

XX Jeannine

[manicscousers]

hiya, Wizz..so glad for you and your sister, nothing like being a mum, or grandmum  ;D

[OllieC]

Ace, I would hate it if you became a woolly minded liberal. Or any other kind of liberal, come to that! Now come here and have a man-hug!

[sarah]

thanks for putting up the podcast it was really interesting and your niece and nephew sound like lovely people. they obviously thought about it a lot first and i think the world would be a better a place with more people like that in it. 

congrtulations wizz you must be on cloud nine. i have a good friend who went down the ivf route to no avail and it was the hardest thing to watch her going through it all.

[Emagggie]

the world would be a better a place with more people like that in it. .quote]

Yup, it certainly would. She's one in a million. ;)

[Deb P]

I've been reading this thread with interest, this subject always brings out strong feelings. With my midwife hat on, I just wanted to comment that formal surrogacy is still fairly uncommon in the area I work in; however informal surrogacy, where women may have a child for a family member or friend and the child is raised by someone other than the birth mother I think has become a lot more common in recent years particularly as fertility problems appear to be on the rise.

Some women are very upfront about it, and tell you their intentions during labour or just after the birth, other times you can just pick up a feeling about it from their or friends/relatives behaviour.  I have only the utmost admiration for any woman prepared to birth a baby for another person; the physical and emotional demands are enormous for all concerned.