Allotments 4 All

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2038093/Bungling-armed-robber-caught-returning-shop-tried-raid--ask-COAT-back.html

When the attempted armed robbery was foiled by a brave shopkeeper,  Anthony Gorman could at least be happy he made his escape without being apprehended.  He was dragged around the store and had his gun, balaclava and hoodie-style jacket taken and was chased off empty handed.  But seemingly oblivious to the adage about never returning to the scene the crime, the gormless 21-year-old returned minutes later to 'politely' beg for his favourite £200 coat back.  Surprised shopkeeper Michael Singh, who had been meditating when the raid happened, simply turned to his attacker and asked: 'Are you stupid?'

Mr Singh, who moments earlier had a gun pointed at his neck by Gorman, added: 'No, you can't have it. Get out.'  It only gets worse for Gorman, who was nicknamed Spider. Without his disguise the shop keeper in Longsight, Manchester recognised him and he was arrested the same day.  Today he was jailed for four and a half years after admitting aggravated burglary and possession of an imitation firearm.

He should change his name to 'Gormless'

Oops, I misread the perpetrator as Anthony Gormley :-[

'nuff said ;)

When I lived in Alnwick many years ago, there was this story often told about one of the locals deciding he would rob the local branch of the TSB.  So he acquired a hunting-type shot gun and off he went.  But of course Alnwick is quite a small place and everyone knows everyone else and people just stood around saying "oh look, there's so-and-so with a stocking on his head, holding up the TSB".

::)