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Ow that hurts!

Started by ACE, July 10, 2012, 12:37:12

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ACE

I had a little lump on my back, had it checked a couple of years ago, nothing to worry about just a cyst. But the stupid thing gets bigger and bigger, then decides to get infected somehow and after a few days of 'it will go away' it didn't. Had it slit  this morning and felt every needle and cut. This ain't nice at all and to top it all I have to go and get the sticky dressing changed in two days which will give nursey great pleasure ripping it off my hairy back.

I thought I would let you all know so when you hear a scream followed by some choice language on Thursday you will  know who it is.

ACE


chriselst

I had a cyst cut out of my back years ago.

I felt a lot of pressure when they did it, but no pain.

Driving myself to the hospital was a stupid idea though, couldn't sit back in the seat trying to drive home again.

I also got fed up with the supposedly dissolvable stitches not dissolving, so removed them myself with some nail clippers.

pumkinlover

Don't they use local anaesthetic down there Ace?

ACE

Quote from: pumpkinlover on July 10, 2012, 12:51:14
Don't they use local anaesthetic down there Ace?

I think they pretend to. More than likely the ice cubes from the doctors gin and tonic, he sounded a bit three sheets to the wind this morning.

pumkinlover

Quote from: ACE on July 10, 2012, 12:58:35
Quote from: pumpkinlover on July 10, 2012, 12:51:14
Don't they use local anaesthetic down there Ace?

I think they pretend to. More than likely the ice cubes from the doctors gin and tonic, he sounded a bit three sheets to the wind this morning.

Just ask for the gin and tonic yourself next time ;)

Ru1

Good luck on Thursday then.

Think you may need it  :-X :-X

brownowl23

Hope the nurse is nice and does it quick, rather than peeling it one hair at a time.

misfit

if we hear something thats like greek traditional music(pling pling pling) we will know its the plaster slowlyyyy being peeled away  ;D

ACE

Quote from: brownowl23 on July 10, 2012, 14:57:33
Hope the nurse is nice


Where are these nice pretty nurses nowadays, not around this way. The one in the clinic holds you in a headlock to take your temperature. I might be lucky and she will be out training with the russian shot put team. And ugly, I kid you not. If my dog had a face like hers I would shave his @rse and teach him to walk backwards.
I can picture her now with her knee in the small of my back while she yanks the plaster off. You would think she would be nice to me after I gave her a shaving kit for xmas one year.

steve76

^^^ ;D ;D ;D

I love reading your comments Ace, always puts a smile on my face.. keep them coming..

BarriedaleNick

I once had a massive cyst on my neck - I was known as Two Heads at work for a while as it was huge.  The d**n thing was right on the collar line..
So I went to my local doc who scowled at me in the way docs do to make it seem like it was my fault...
Shaking his head he scribbled a note and said "Go to the hospital - you need that lanced"...
Well I was working shifts at the time so I told him that I could make it in maybe 4 or 5 days time.
He wasn't at all happy about that and went all old school one - ranting that people can die of these things and that if it burst I would get septisemia or some other equally misspelt condition..

So I popped along the the Hospital and a lovely nurse numbed at and had at it with a scaple...  Boy the relief was good but I did feel a little sorry for the nurse as it stank like someone had vomitted in a cess pit and left it to ferment..  She said that she loved doing cysts as you could see the instant relief it bought..  I thought her a little unbalanced.

Believe it or not and dont ask how I know but there are websites devoted to this sort of thing - you have been warned!!!  http://www.popthatzit.com
Moved to Portugal - ain't going back!

goodlife

Believe it or not and dont ask how I know but there are websites devoted to this sort of thing - you have been warned!!! 

:o...EEK!....YUCK!.... ::) Thanks for that Chris..most informative site.. ;D

Jeannine

Oh Ace, you poor old thing.

Maybe you should take a few Gin and  Ts before you go, or better still share them with the shot putting nurse.

You could also loosen the plaster before you go, if it is hanging on by a thread she won't get so much of a kick out of it.

Good luck

XX Jeannine
When God blesses you with a multitude of seeds double  the blessing by sharing your  seeds with other folks.

Tin Shed

Ooh - I do like a good wound dressing  ;)

Do you want me to comr and hold your hand ;D

Borlotti

Men are such wimps, try giving birth.  ;D ;D ;D ;D

antipodes

Quote from: ACE on July 10, 2012, 15:39:22
Where are these nice pretty nurses nowadays, not around this way. The one in the clinic holds you in a headlock to take your temperature. I might be lucky and she will be out training with the russian shot put team. And ugly, I kid you not. If my dog had a face like hers I would shave his @rse and teach him to walk backwards.
I can picture her now with her knee in the small of my back while she yanks the plaster off. You would think she would be nice to me after I gave her a shaving kit for xmas one year.

I now have tears running down my face with suppressed laughter at my desk over this one!!! Oh well the workmates already think I am two rungs short on the ladder so....
2012 - Snow in February, non-stop rain till July. Blight and rot are rife. Thieving voles cause strife. But first runner beans and lots of greens. Follow an English allotment in urban France: http://roos-and-camembert.blogspot.com

Mimi

Dont be mean to the poor nurse Ace. Slowly pulling plasters off hairy gorilla like backs are the only pleasures we are allowed to have in the NHS these days.   :P
Take time to stop and smell the flowers.

ACE

It was a bloke nurse this time or it might have been a passing biker having a hook around in there to get the wick out, but I had to go to A & E as something went wrong in the night and the bed looked like a butchers shop, blood and snot everywhere.

Dressing needs changing everyday now, so more joy for the shot putter. I will sweet talk her tomorrow and get her a bottle of Brut for a present, then I might be able  wangle some spare dressings and let the Yeti in pink knickers get in on the act. A length of 4" by 2" by my side and she will bit gentler, I bet.


Ellen K

Honestly, all this drama over a zit  ::)

ACE

Quote from: Ellen K on July 12, 2012, 09:32:37
Honestly, all this drama over a zit  ::)

You ain't seen nothing yet, just wait till I get man flu.

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