Topic: Personal message

[tricia]

I've just received a PM asking for seeds from someone who registered today and who has not posted on any boards! The subject is "seeds", so I don't even know to which seeds he is referring!

I personally think it is impertinent to ask for something as a complete newbie - what do others think?

Tricia

[ceres]

I haven't been on here in months and I got the same message.  Registered 3.35pm, my PM received 4.05pm.  Fast worker.  And what pissed me off even more is he didn't even use the 'P'(lease) word.  And he's not in the UK.  Bloody cheek.

[Robert_Brenchley]

I'm quite happy to get requests from regulars, especially when they contribute seeds themselves, or newbies who contribute to the site and are trying to get started. But that's going a bit far!

[Tin Shed]

This request reminds me of a recent one on my local freecycle - from a man who had just got an allotment and wanted........a shed, waterbutt, compost bin, spade, fork and seeds  :o  I nearly replied to ask if he wanted me to dig it for him as well ;)
 I might have thought it was the same and the same person if you hadn't said that this poster lived outside the UK!!!

[Jeannine]

It is sad when something like this happens, it makes us all wary of newbies which is sad in itself as often they go on to be great A4A members.I find this in particularly poor taste as the person is sending PMs which suggests to me this is the only point to be on here.It would be interesting to make a note of the name and watch and see what happens with it... I am sometimes cautious of newbies whose first post is a request for seeds or one to join a seed swap, I repeat this is sad but I lost 2 large seed swap parcels last year and I think both the posters  who were the last to receive them are gone now. It might also be interesting to check in the posters country and see if they are known there.

XX Jeannine

[poohs tao]

am wandering if this person is targetting your length of time on a4a as i haven't recieved a pm. or maybe the swap page to see who v generouslly offers.

[1066]

I had one very similar to this but it was last year - and they asked for whole packets . I'd just put up a message to swap a load of stuff that I no longer wanted / or had too much of. They had also just registered, and I said sorry they were all gone, but to keep on posting and checking the swap board. I didn't hear anything back from them and I don't think they posted again.
For someone who comes across A4A and sees the swap shop, it must look very tempting! And as this site really does work on a trust basis, I guess it looks very friendly and welcoming.

Its a difficult call and I guess up to the person who has the seeds to swap to make the decision. And we were all newbies once  ::)  ;D
1066

PS - Nice to see you around Ceres  :)

[lottiedolly]

I just think it is a shame that people like that can spoil it for the decent people. We do share based on trust and with the idea that we are all like minded enthusiastic growers. One of the other forums i am a member of had a rash of these types of requests and they had to put in a type of rule which they hated doing, but they did not want people to take them for fools. they basically said that seed swaps should be with people that had been on the forum for at least a month had a minimum amount of posts (not just in the seed swap area) and basically was a real member of that forum. Now i am not saying that we do this here, but it seems that all forums are getting hit with these types of people now.  >:(

[nilly71]

It's hard for me to comment on this as I done the same thing when I joined.
I had only just got my very overgrown plot and was doing a search online for free seeds, I meant free seeds like the BBC Dig IT. Jeannine's post come up, it was the one about her leaving the UK and she was giving away loads of seeds.
I pm'd her and said once everyone had their pick, could i have a few seeds that might be left over. You can imagine my suprise when about 60 different types of seeds come through my door. I then went on to swap loads that i did not use.
I like to think I contributed to this forum ever since(apart from the last few months).

I have also asked for loads of stuff on Freecycle, I have also asked for 4-5 things in one post. It's amazing how much people throw out, about a month ago someone gave away a petrol tiller.

Some forums I go on you have to post at least 50  good posts before being allowed access to the classifieds.

I think everyone has to make thier own judgement when receiving pm's as we are not all bad.

Neil
p.s I would not give anything to anyone who does not say at least please ;)

[Robert_Brenchley]

I didn't use the swap board for six months after I joined the site, but that's not to say that a newbie shouldn't. We've just got to be a little careful.

[Jeannine]

I have just posted my promised swap with new seeds from Canada and have said it is open to  participating members. When I look at someone who has had 6 posts and 5 of them are for seeds or swap parcels I don't truly feel that is participating,  at least not yet. I also get concerned when the first post is asking for something, so if I get a request to join the swap from this kind of member I will not accept them at this time. I don't think I am being mean but the seeds I am buying will cost quite a lot so I feel it prudent in light of the many swaps that were lost last year.

XX Jeannine

[Le-y]

i still class myself as a newbie here, i haven't used the swops yet, mainly cos i dont really have anything i think anyone would be interested in as all my seeds come from wilcos and everyones got access to that shop lol!

plus i do think its only good manners to get to know people first hopefully by the end of this year everyone will know me, i do talk a lot  ;D

[Digeroo]

I felt bad about it but I also rejected newbies or people who only pop up for swaps.  One joined in ernest and I added that name at a later date.

One package has got lost this year but my one is still chugging along.  Person or persons unknown also took considerably more than they put back.  So you are right to emphasise the swap nature and that people must only take a few of each type of seeds.

[Jeannine]

Le-y you are not a newbie anymore sweetie, you have participated well XX Jeannine

[grawrc]

When I post on the swap parcels I get a proof of posting at the PO. This covers the parcel for (I think!) up to £30. It is also a way of ascertaining that the parcel was actually posted. If we adhere to that rule we would at least have £30 towards replacing the lost seeds or, if the person who last had the packet couldn't or wouldn't produce such a proof of posting we would know who the thief was.

[Spudbash]

A4A is a wonderful source of advice and a real community. In any community, you'll get people who try it on, against the spirit of the group.

Swappers, please don't be deflected from your aims - I haven't participated in any swaps, but I get a warm glow reading about them!  ;D

Individuals who try it on need to hear the word NO, however that's best communicated in a forum such as this.  >:(

[1066]

It took me ages to join in on the swaps - courage and confidence being 2 things that held me back I think :-[ And also like Le-y I felt I only had standard stuff. I did eventually pluck up the courage and offered spare seeds tho  :D
And now, yup I'm addicted - but I have yet to try any of the round robin swapsies........

[tricia]

I have replied courteously to the request for seeds - pointing out that, although we are a friendly and helpful bunch of people, we have become wary of newbies who join, request free seeds and disappear. I suggested he post on 'The Shed' to introduce himself and tell us a bit about his allotment/garden etc., so we can see that he is a genuine newbie to A4All and intends to become a contributing member.

We shall see.

Tricia

[Mortality]

i still class myself as a newbie here, i haven't used the swops yet, mainly cos i dont really have anything i think anyone would be interested in

That goes for me too, the nice thing here is that I've already been offered seeds to try without even asking. It is a shame to see that some new people are trying to take too much advantage of other peoples' generosity.

[rosebud]

 I have to say that i am guilty of asking for cuttings of the odd plant & have asked for seeds once or twice.  I have never joined in a seed swap because i haven`t many seeds that i could swop. Only this week i have asked for cuttings of Delphs, & very genoursly been offered some seeds that will flower this year. I try not to ask to often for anything but just moving to a new bungalow i am trying to liven up a sad little garden.
I have given lots of seeds away when i had  a big beautifull garden, but never to a very new newbie.