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This is a bit worrying !
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Topic: This is a bit worrying ! (Read 2504 times)
Granny_Smith
Half Acre
Posts: 232
Of course its me - who else could look like this ?
This is a bit worrying !
«
on:
February 10, 2004, 11:42:00 »
Rule Brittania ?
Very proud to be British..
Because...
Only in Britain... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Britain... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Britain... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a DIET coke.
Only in Britain... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
Only in Britain... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in Britain... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
Only in Britain... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.
NOT TO MENTION...
3 people die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
142 people were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
58 people are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.
31 people have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.
19 people have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.
British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.
Since 1999 101 people have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.
18 people received serious burns while trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 people were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
5 people were injured last year in accidents involving out of control Scalextric cars.
And finally.........
In 2000 eight people cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.
«
Last Edit: January 01, 1970, 01:00:00 by 1077926400
»
Logged
Granny is still your best friend !
Mimi
Hectare
Posts: 1,821
Pretty in Pink
Re: This is a bit worrying !
«
Reply #1 on:
February 10, 2004, 12:36:45 »
;D Love the disabled car park outside the ice skating rink... is that for before or after???????
«
Last Edit: January 01, 1970, 01:00:00 by 1077926400
»
Logged
Take time to stop and smell the flowers.
tim
Hectare
Posts: 18,607
Just like the old days!
Re: This is a bit worrying !
«
Reply #2 on:
February 10, 2004, 12:38:09 »
It's in the book - thanks!! = Tim
«
Last Edit: January 01, 1970, 01:00:00 by 1077926400
»
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Ozzy_aka_Pothead
Guest
Re: This is a bit worrying !
«
Reply #3 on:
February 10, 2004, 12:59:50 »
Ha ha ha nice one GS
heres one for yoooze
only in Ireland is there an 18 month waiting list for a bed in the maternity ward......
Oz
xxxx
«
Last Edit: January 01, 1970, 01:00:00 by 1077926400
»
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cleo
Hectare
Posts: 2,641
I love Allotments 4 All
Re: This is a bit worrying !
«
Reply #4 on:
February 10, 2004, 16:03:05 »
A bet there are no official statistics on this one but I have developed a small callous on the outside of my left hand index finger.
Pricking out?,weeding?-picking my nose in a vigorous way?-no,it`s from sliding my mouse around its mat-it only dawned on me today!! ;D
Stephan.
«
Last Edit: January 01, 1970, 01:00:00 by 1077926400
»
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Granny_Smith
Half Acre
Posts: 232
Of course its me - who else could look like this ?
Re: This is a bit worrying !
«
Reply #5 on:
February 10, 2004, 16:07:40 »
A medical first - What shall we call it ?
I know ------
It's a mouse matter !!
«
Last Edit: January 01, 1970, 01:00:00 by 1077926400
»
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Granny is still your best friend !
SueT
Acre
Posts: 484
I love Allotments 4 All
Re: This is a bit worrying !
«
Reply #6 on:
February 10, 2004, 16:24:54 »
Very funny, I enjoyed that! Why do people get the urge to stick their tongues on a battery I wonder..........very strange ??? ;D
«
Last Edit: January 01, 1970, 01:00:00 by 1077926400
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Sue
eileen
Hectare
Posts: 2,074
I love Allotments 4 All
Re: This is a bit worrying !
«
Reply #7 on:
February 10, 2004, 18:08:32 »
Opening a bottle of beer with your teeth AAARRRGGGHHH gives me the shivers just thinking about it!!! As for putting on a jersey with a f*g in your mouth - blimey you could get the f*g end down your bra and that could be really nasty :o :o
«
Last Edit: January 01, 1970, 01:00:00 by 1077926400
»
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EILEEN.
Life is like nectar sweet but sometimes sticky.
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