Topic: Bit morbid I guess but.do you have a living will

[Jeannine]

I have not done this yet in fact I have no will at all but I am thinking about it more and more and would like to hear what others did.

Also writing a normal will when children are estranged what is the best way to do that, and do you leave all this witha lawyer.

XX Jeannine

[grawrc]

I have a will which I made when I married Peter. When he died I updated it. It is with my lawyers but increasingly I think I'd rather have it at home, although I do have a copy at home. We have 6 children between us. When he died, under Scots law (I don't know if it's different in Canada), his 3 daughters had the right to inherit one third of his moveable estate between them irrespective of the fact that in his will he left everything to me. They relinquished that right in my favour since they knew that was what their Dad wanted. My will leaves everything to the 6 of them.

I don't think (here anyway) it matters if the children are estranged. They still apparently have a right of inheritance.

There's some useful info here:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/money/2009/jun/02/intestate-will-writing

I don't have a living will as such. As long as I can still do the crossword and sudoku I guess I can cope! ;)

[Squash64]

Do you mean something like this?
http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Governmentcitizensandrights/Death/Preparation/DG_10029429

I think it's a very sensible thing to do but it's probably one of those things that not many of us want to think about.

[Baccy Man]

Living wills are still a fairly new concept in Canada & what they cover varies according to the province you live in. Typically it would give somebody you name power of attorney over your finances and/or medical treatment and/or organ donation. All your wishes would be in writing to guide them as to what you want to happen.
There is an explanation of how they work & links to the legislation for each province here:
http://www.cbc.ca/news/background/wills/

[saddad]

I have a "your dead now" will and OH knows my views on Organ donation etc..  :-*

[Mortality]

It is always best to tell your family what you wish to be done should you die.

My mother was a nurse and her wish was to be an organ doner.
She had late onset Diabeties and May 2006 aged 56 she got an infection which her body was unable to cope with, she went into intensive care and suffered a massive brain stem stroke, brain dead. Three people recieved her organs and I hope they are alive and well today.  :)

[PurpleHeather]

It costs very little to make a will, the solicitors like to keep it so that they will be the ones who then deal with the estate, that is the bit they make their money on. Every one should make one because if they do not, not only will their money probably go to the wrong people, it will mean a lot is wasted in legal and other costs. They need witnessing properly too. If in doubt there are will forms in WH Smiths and other stationery shops with instructions on them. At a low cost.

It can be surprising just how much we are worth dead, an insurance here and there, a bit of property, jewelwry, car, house contents. It all adds up, even though we might not much in savings...Parents need to nominate a person to act for them too, the obvious person is not always the best. 

As for living wills, it is far better to let the family know what you want because the decision often has to be made quite quickly, in fact a donor often has to be kept 'alive' to make sure that the organs are kept fresh. That is a bad way of putting it I know, but I am one of those who regard the body as a machine which drives the vehicle.

At one time there was an age limit of 40 for organ donations but as I understand it there are some parts of the body which can be used at any age.

Scottish law is different from English law in a lot of things. 

When my parents died, because they were elderly and expected to die and I was their only child, I had been told where everything was, so that it made it easy for me and all the powers that be were very kind and helpful. Particularly the Prudential Insurance company whom I highly recommend to any one. AXA on the other hand were most certainly not and I still have the correspondence to prove it.

[Hyacinth]

For organ donation, one can register on-line (google it if you want) and you're put on their data base and get confiirmation back by e-mail. I forwarded this mail on to my son who is my next of kin. Simples.

Bought a Funeral Plan some years ago, so that's sorted.

Got a will which I updated a short while ago & I keep it.

Have written a list of readings & hymns (taking into account very few of my family & friends can sing a note, certainly can't hit the high notes, so I've made allowances for that ;D)

 Son knows where everything is, so no probs. there.

He also knows my views on resuscitation, so I reckon everything's covered.

Not at all morbid - after all, even Methuselah didn't manage to live forever ::)

My thoughts are that there will be enough to do (poss. even to have to do it while grieving? :-\) and if I can ensure that the necessities are covered by me, it's the best way I can help. Call it a mother's love, if you will..

MEANWHILE!...I continue to live as though there's no termorra and enjoying every minute of it (except the recent snow - have I mentioned that I HATE snow? ;) ;D)

[caroline7758]

If you want to make a will and you're not in a rush, wait until November and use"Will Aid" which means the money goes to a charity rather than the soilicitor- wedid this afew years ago.

http://www.willaid.org.uk/

Sorry togo off topic slightly, Jeannine! ;)

[Jeannine]

Thank you all so much for your links and help, so much to look at. My problem is I have children  that don't see me (long story which need not be expanded) and I need to be certain sure that anything we have goes equally between them all. Other problem is we don't have a relative who is suitable to act for us.

Meanwhile, like Hyacinth said I shall live like there is no tomorrow, and then some!!

Thank you all again.

XX Jeannine

[Paulines7]

We bought a will from WH Smith but haven't completed it yet though I have read through the documentation.

Should anyone be interested, our local paper has an advert for Barnardo's.  They are offering free wills.

I was the Executor for both my parents and found the process very easy and not too time consuming.  I had the free leaflet "What to do when someone dies" and found it very useful.  In all, I saved my mother thousands of pounds in Solicitors fees and everything was settled in four weeks. 

My cousin employed a solicitor when his parents died and it took two years to sort it out.  They charged thousands of pounds too. 

I haven't done a living will but am thinking about it.  I will definitely do one if I start to get Alzheimers. 

[Hyacinth]

Jeannine, Pauline's mentioned being executrix for her parents...just want to say that you don't have to be a rel. to do this. I'm the ex. of a friend, even though she has a nok who prefers that I do it too. SO....friends, someone at your church perhaps? If you decide to set this up now, something else I've done, to allow quick access to cash needed for settling last bills AND A BIG PARTY! 8)has been to open a separate account with my exec (OK, it's my son in my case, obv) with either/or to sign. It's kept with my Will and ensures that there's no possible delay in accessing money (s*d the utility companies - it's the vintners bill I want to make sure gets paid). ;D ;D ;D

[bridgehouse]

My husband and I have just made our wills, I have four children from my first marriage ,My second husband was not married before, if my  husband die,s before me everything comes to me.If I die before him everything go's to him.
And here is the rub, if we had not made wills, and I died first, then he died, my children would inherit nothing at all. it would all go to my husbands cousins, who he does not see or like .
So what I am getting at is it is very important to make a will. to safeguard your family in cases like this,
    June.

[GrannieAnnie]

We have living wills but almost more important was talking our wishes over with our children. Kept in safety deposit box and in our files, witnessed by friends.

When my parents were terminally ill my sister and I had a very easy time of it- no arguments- about what their wishes were (no extraordinary measures etc). It was a great comfort to know we were all on the same page.