Just said to my wife that we have to make 4 more payments before June to pay for are second holiday abroad in our lifetime. Not bad I thought but the thing is we are now both in are fifties and this is only are second holiday out of this country, to do it my wife as had to go into full time work to help pay for it, yet I see people up the road from us going abroad every year who do not work, where have I gone wrong, do not get me wrong I do not begrudge them a Holiday but we are so often told that we are far better off these days. Well I came from a family of eight and my mother never had to go out to work to help pay for things, we always had good meals on the table three times a day, and was always clothed well and my Father was only on a farm workers wage. So why does it now take both partners to work just to try to get a good style of living. I have worked hard all my working life not, on good wages I know but have lived within my means but, I feel as though I have done something wrong some where not to be able to get further forward in my life to what I am, they say save for the future but I do not seem to have enough money to live from one week unto another. What as gone wrong ?
We have got to be better off. I was nearly the same as you. I come from a family of 5, mother stayed at home to cook and clean, dinner always on the table, clothes on my back.
I left home at 14 to join the navy, so was still clothed and fed. When I came back to civvy street I made a decision to buy instead of rent and worked really hard to bring up my own children, but even working hard still meant a provvy cheque at xmas.
Life began at 45, morgage paid, 2 cars and a harley in the garage, 2 or 3 holidays a year, little fishing boat, my own little business, I can't spend it fast enough. But I work harder than ever.
Yes I am better off, I love my job and my missus works in a job she loves. We work hard and play hard.
You've never had it so good,so go out and enjoy it.
bless ya richard, i understand how you feel. my parteners parents are on holidays every few months....and yet his mum works full time, but his dad isn't able to work due to disabilities.
if you know where to look, you can find some very cheap holidays. perhaps the people you see on holidays every few months are going on these cheap holidays.
like you can get return tickets to spain for about £80 at some places. there are some people that even do tickets for as low as £20 or less for spain....as long as you don't mind flying round the whole world before finally getting to spain lol.
a friend of mine is a student and doesn't have any income, yet she still manages to have holidays every few months. she does this by researching loads and loads on the internet. she plans her own days, stays in hostels (she's 46 i think), and does everything she wants to within a couple of hundred pounds.
package holidays and time share is a HUGE rip off. unless you have huge families and plan to go on long luxurious holidays, there's no need for package holidays.
and i'm 21 and in the same boat as you that i never have enough mney to make it from one month to another. but you just need to learn to budget. i know it sounds patronising.....but it's really as easy as that.
for example....my partener and i used to live on our own once and didn't have a kitchen. we ordered food out every day, even things that appeared to be cheap like the chippy. once we moved to my dads place where there's a kitchen, we started to cook in....and it's surprising how much less money we were spending.
if there's a will, there's a way. surround yourself with the right people and the right thoughts and there's nothing you can't do.
my mum didn't go out to work for a long time, BUT, she had no washing machine, we had a black and white second hand tv, rag mats on the floor, no car as they both smoked, no holidays,
I was 15 before my dad gave up smoking and bought a little car,
we have so many 'things ' now that need insurance, upkeep, e.g. dvd's, freezers, central heating, double glazing, I don't think it was all that good in 'the good old days', we used to have ice to the top of the windows and had to get dressed in front of the open fire..
I bet my mum would have liked central heating.. :)
so now, I count my blessings,family, friends, food, warmth and the things we have are just that, things :) :)
getting off my soap box now, sorry for the rant :)
i do understand what you mean aswell manicsc. it really does depend on the times really doesn't it. i mean we're always better off than somebody else....but that doesn't change the situation we're in. the average person now goes on a lot of holidays, there's a lot more disposable income around and people generally spend a lot more on luxury items.
There's a lot more debt too to finance the lifestyle.
I think the key to Richard's post is that he says he lives within his means.
well, i suppose my life has been a stuggle my dh dosn,t work becouse of sickness
i work 30hrs a week as a cleaner,i,m 60 this year but shall carry on working because
i enjoy the things i can afford , not alot up to other people but much more than my
parents and my good health gives me that choice. my mum and dad were old and worn out at my age!! even if dh has prolems modern life gives him much better support
then say40years ago
I've wondered many a time how people can afford the things they have. Even when our son was at school and my husband and I worked we still couldn't afford a holiday that a) wasn't out of season and b) wasn't in the UK.
I can't for the life of me work out how the families around here with three or more kids that are clearly on benefits manage their trips abroad and their cars etc. Actually I can work it out and if I had the bottled I'd ring the "be a DSS grass" hotline!
Alishka you have hit the nail on the head I do live within my needs and I also echo YPs comments
Off the top of my head I know 5 youngish peeps who are claiming DLA - a ticket for life, that is. One actually had a party when his came through....and then I know 2 peeps, elderly, crippled with arthritis who have to go up & down their stairs on their bottoms, get refused (routinely I think) at the first application and won't be persuaded to appeal the decision (when invariably the 1st refusal will get overturned). >:(
Better off now? I am 8th one of nine children. Routine every Sunday the last two girls at home had to take it in turn to wash all upstairs floors (lino) one week and downstairs rooms the next week. How I hated those bl**dy horrible coconut mats ::).Dad wasn't able to work very often due to falling in to a bomb crater about 1941 so Mum went to work (Crosse & Blackwells) so money was tight. So although I worked in our businesses most of my married life it was my choice and not a real necessity. I consider that husband and me and later our children have been better off than my parents. One good thing about those days was making our own entertainment. Holidays? We always went to Margate for a day each year and one day to London museums.
I have been thinking the same thing latey, i work full time single person, and still find it hard, i have to save to take one holiday a year and thats to see my sister, i know people claiming everything they can , and have more then me going in the bank each month, i was brave enough to grass but did any thing happen about it NO.
A lot of my friends seem to have everything holidays at a drop of the hat, nice car house has all the lastest stuff, but then take a closer look and there in DEBIT up to ther eyes.
so i may not have everything but i have everything if you now what i mean.
family , a job, life, and people i love.
and no DEBIT
I think with a bit of thought I should have chosen a better heading for my gripe, I know that I am better of then how my parents used to live but, like plimsoll just find it hard to save anything out of my weekly wage once the bills are paid.
Just take a look around the average house and see how many items there are that simply did not exist 40 years ago. We regard most of these things as essentials rather than luxuries. All these things cost money to use or maintain. And cars - back then, by no means every household had a car at all, yet now there is usually one per adult with all their associated costs.
Quote from: plimsoll plot2 on January 14, 2007, 19:56:16
I have been thinking the same thing latey, i work full time single person, and still find it hard, i have to save to take one holiday a year and thats to see my sister, i know people claiming everything they can , and have more then me going in the bank each month, i was brave enough to grass but did any thing happen about it NO.
A lot of my friends seem to have everything holidays at a drop of the hat, nice car house has all the lastest stuff, but then take a closer look and there in DEBIT up to ther eyes.
so i may not have everything but i have everything if you now what i mean.
family , a job, life, and people i love.
and no DEBIT
hmm....i guess in that sense you have to be careful really. if you don't know exactly what's going on, you can't really judge people because they SEEM to be more wealthy that you. if they're on benefits, there must be a reason. i've applied for different types of benefits twice and i know the questions they aks, they checks they do, the people they talk to before the give you money. and even then they keep on reviewing your situation.
i know it seems like there are a lot of people on benefits when they shouldn't be....but you shouldn't always judge a book by it's cover in that sense.
Quote from: wahaj on January 14, 2007, 20:21:11
hmm....i guess in that sense you have to be careful really. if you don't know exactly what's going on, you can't really judge people because they SEEM to be more wealthy that you. if they're on benefits, there must be a reason. i've applied for different types of benefits twice and i know the questions they aks, they checks they do, the people they talk to before the give you money. and even then they keep on reviewing your situation.
i know it seems like there are a lot of people on benefits when they shouldn't be....but you shouldn't always judge a book by it's cover in that sense.
On the contrary, Waj. I've got no problem with peeps on benefits. I myself claimed maternity benefits back when I had my son. What I do have a problem with is people who are quite capable of working that a) claim the dole because they're too lazy to get off their a*ses and work and b) claim benefit but also do cash in hand jobs which leaves them pretty much rolling in it and I
do begrudge those people that money and those luxuries because it's coming out of the pockets of mugs like me who are paying for it.
<jumping off soapbox and exhaling> ;D
please don't carry on with this , there are lots of people out there, like my mum and dad in law 87, both, who feel BL**dy awful about asking for anything, we've only just persuaded them to claim benefits and they now feel like they cannot tell anyone because they will be seen as leeches, god help them, :( :)
Tsk. To clarify, I was not talking about people who need, have or deserve to claim but people who don't need to claim and abuse the system which of course does NOT include your mum and dad, Scousers :-\ I assumed my post was clear but apologise for any confusion.
And ok, will say no more.
In terms of time saving appliances - yes. If any of you had a choice between spending time relaxing/gardening/socialising/other or doing the laundry by hand (as did my mum, and I'm only 32) then I can probably guess which option the majority of people opt for.
in terms of having spare cash, holidays, new cars every year etc - no. But then you could say that's because one half of us is self employed in a new business and we chose this lifestyle.
We're careful with our money; didn't take the biggest morgage allwance we were offered; don't use the credit card for everyday things; we have 10 year old cars (that's two of them); don't buy first editions or visit michelin starred restaurants like we used to and it hasn't done us any harm. Infact, it's made us appreciate and enjoy those moments more because we have to save for them.
There are several keys to this: live within your means, develop self worth so that material objects are not necessary to define who you are, if aid is there for your needs, ask for it and fight for it.
And grass up those that bleed the system; many moons ago, I did exactly that. We shouldn't have to work hard and pay increasing stealth taxes so some can take advantage. Close the net, they're living by the sword so let them die by it, too.
Both my wife and I work full time. We have had 1 holiday other than our honeymoon in 10years. Kids came along and childcare is not cheap. We pay £100per week for our son Mon-Fri. My wife drops him off at nursery so childminder only has him from 1130-1700hrs! £5000pa from household income - thats where my good living is going - the childminders holiday!
There always seems to be more month left at the end of the money..... ::)
I can (just about) remember the days when chicken was too expensive to have except as a Christmas treat. I'd say we were better off.
Fed up with bloody chicken >:( steak would be nice for a change. ;D
Steak at 3/6 a pound was just way out of reach when my father's takehome was £17.10.00 a week. At least, I think that was the takehome, he didn't actually specify whether it was before or after tax.
I'm not going to knock all those that are on benefits, as some are purely unemployable. It is the fault of the state that they encourage the work shy.
But when I was working for the local authority, some of the people out of work were better off than I was. It was hard to earn £1000 a month after deductions, but some of these people were on £1200 plus all the free rent and extra benefits I could not claim as I was earning a few pounds too much. I did at one time think about joining them.
As for holidays they have periods that they do not have to sign on so they can go away. I have a relative who is coming up to fifty and his last full time job was a milk monitor at school. He goes on holiday, has a decent car, rent free house in the country and spends a lot of time in his local pub. Where is the incentive to get a job, he would be worse off.
I still say you can be better off if you work harder, in the past things have got so hard I have held down 3 jobs at a time, then when things were better I carried on with the jobs to get a few luxuries. Naturally it is no good burning yourself out. So 3 months hard graft, then a month off.
Due to knowing hard times I am still thrifty up to a point. Most of my pay comes at the end of a contract so I have big highs and low lows, we have to be very careful at times. but I am not going to save it for ever, (there are no pockets in a shroud)
I have a pension in place, it will not give me a good standard of living, but bugger it, the state can look after me, I've paid my dues.
Dad worked full time 'when I were a lass' and my sis and I never went without, but we could never afford holidays abroad and normally went home to Devon to stay at Grans for a couple of weeks. Then as we got older, mum and dad splashed out and brought a tent so we went camping for 2 weeks in the summer - that was it. I didn't go abroad on holiday until I worked and was 19, and that was to Amsterdam to go visit the bulb festival and fields. For a few years I managed a couple of good holidays a year, but mum and dad didn't take housekeeping from us, we had to have a pension and a regular amount going into a savings account instead. Once I had my first mortgage, holidays abroad stopped. My darling and I had 2 weeks in Greece the year I fell pregnant with daughter number one, but that was out of season and cheap. Now my darling works full time, and earns a good salary, but with stepdaughter, and our 2, like KT says, there is usually a lot of month left after the money has all gone. We go to France in the summer which we have to scrape around for all year. I now work semi full time - only school hours :) - which is really helping, but still we couldn't afford a 'flash' holiday. There are families at school who have lots of really fancy hols every year - Africa, Florida, India as well as lots of breaks to Disney Paris and the like. All I can assume is they spend a lot of money on credit cards - something we don't own, or they have a lower/cheaper standard of living to us. Stepdaughter costs us the same price as some peoples mortgage every month which is painful.
My darling and I have such exciting times to come....we have no pension, no savings, no nothing, only these 4 walls..................wanted, family sized cardboard box!
Both me & the old woman work full time, both non smoker's very really go out for a drink, allways pay the bills on time and at the end of the month sit there and think where did it all go? :'( On the essentials in life Gas bill, Electrick bill Water rates Poll tax, and (if like me who as to have a car to go to work in) the price of a gallon of petrol, that's where! or should i say the taxes we pay on sed luxury's light, warmth, water having ya bin (2bins now)emptied and driving to work . >:(
Cardboard box EJ ...... luxury ....me and mine will have to live in lake in an old Co-op bag ...if wi lucky ;)
Quote from: Yellow Petals on January 14, 2007, 20:42:16
Quote from: wahaj on January 14, 2007, 20:21:11
hmm....i guess in that sense you have to be careful really. if you don't know exactly what's going on, you can't really judge people because they SEEM to be more wealthy that you. if they're on benefits, there must be a reason. i've applied for different types of benefits twice and i know the questions they aks, they checks they do, the people they talk to before the give you money. and even then they keep on reviewing your situation.
i know it seems like there are a lot of people on benefits when they shouldn't be....but you shouldn't always judge a book by it's cover in that sense.
On the contrary, Waj. I've got no problem with peeps on benefits. I myself claimed maternity benefits back when I had my son. What I do have a problem with is people who are quite capable of working that a) claim the dole because they're too lazy to get off their a*ses and work and b) claim benefit but also do cash in hand jobs which leaves them pretty much rolling in it and I do begrudge those people that money and those luxuries because it's coming out of the pockets of mugs like me who are paying for it.
<jumping off soapbox and exhaling> ;D
Can only shake my head at one who is so little minded.................... Benefits here
but your way of thinking will be under A.................I never chose my lifestyle....my lifestyle
chose me.................I have a daughter who needs round the clock care and watching
I had to give up a good job to do it............no sky....................no hols................no car
here................ but before you spout oral diarrhea..........think...and as Wahaj said..........
never judge a book by its cover
Quote from: jaggythistle on January 15, 2007, 12:38:43
Can only shake my head at one who is so little minded.................... Benefits here
but your way of thinking will be under A.................I never chose my lifestyle....my lifestyle
chose me.................I have a daughter who needs round the clock care and watching
I had to give up a good job to do it............no sky....................no hols................no car
here................ but before you spout oral diarrhea..........think...and as Wahaj said..........
never judge a book by its cover
[/quote]
Quote from: Yellow Petals on January 14, 2007, 22:50:29
Tsk. To clarify, I was not talking about people who need, have or deserve to claim
Guess you must have missed this part or were you just choosing to be selective before your inane ramble?
Thats exactly how I am froglegs, once the bills are paid and the weekly shop done there seems to be nothing left. Like you we do not go out drinking, we are both non smokers and do not have any credit cards to pay of. Mine you I do suppose I spoil the grandchildren here and there.
It's amazing how much the outgoings add up to. Neither my husband or I smoke, we have a bottle of wine on weekends and our one luxury (apart from the car and the tv!) is our movie passes which cost us £10 each a month but we did fall in to the trap of credit cards and a loan to buy our much needed car so that was quite a sum to pay back (the car loan is now finished) but we are now in the throws (sp?) of paying off every debt to the last penny asap and being real penny pinchers as we're saving desperately to move to Canada in (we hope) three years. My husband has just given himself a pay rise and when I eventually get off of my sick leave I will be putting in loads of overtime to try and boost our finances a bit this year.
I don't know about others but it seems the more money that comes in, there always seems to be something that takes it up so we never really feel any better off lol
Most replies seem to agree that for those of us who work, and live modestly within our income, there seems to be not much reward, and little left over for luxuries, and I could quite understand that argument...
...until I looked at my receipts from the last couple of weeks shopping at Woolies and Wilkos...
Room for another in your cardboard box, EJ?
;D ;D ;D
From this, I'm wishing Richard and his wife a wonderful, well-earned and well-deserved holiday this year and hope that it's the best ever so far, and YP? What a goal to aim at! 8)
Not sure if we are better off nowadays, on speaking to my grandparents they feel they had it better. My partner and I both work but still cannot get on that d**n slippy property ladder so are renting poky little flat with our 2 little girls (hence the lottie for some outdoor living). We don't have credit really as we feel we'll never get ahead if we're always paying credit card bills, so have small overdraft to cover direct debits that always go on wrong day and are just saving like mad for a deposit for house. Rent rates are astronomical down here in the sunny south and it's proving very hard to get ahead. We don't have hols bar a bit of camping in the summer. As for benefit cheats- there will always be people who play the system but what happens to those people when they get old? No home, no savings, no half decent pension- maybe in the end they pay the price for a lifetime of laziness.
We're not comparing like with like - for ourselves - are we?
Earning 10/- a day as a fighter pilot in 1939 - & having a car - does not equate with our current 8 grandchildren situation?
I see that we bought our house in the best cost/income year. Lucky us.
And holidays abroad? Who ever needed them until the agents took over?
If it was not for a Service (& State) pension, we would be struggling.
Just sent you a PM Alishka do not know if they are working but it was just to say thank you for your kind remarks.
My pleasure :-[ :)
I'll second that KT... "always too much month left at the end of the money"
For the first time since the boys came along I have A0 Paid off all my creditcards and B) not gone overdrawn.... I assume it is just a temporary abberation and normal penury will be resumed as soon as possible!
;D
Thinking of gadgets & things - yes, they're a 'must' these days, despite their cost, & I think that they may have absorbed much of the money that should have gone into savings. But I don't think that they necessariy give a 'better' way of life? In the olden days, we did so much by hand that we actually had money to put into savings.
Benefits? It's not all the 'cheating'. Before my Wife had her knee done, She was on Attendance Allowance - by order of the District Nurse. After the op, I asked them to terminate it. After some to-ing & from-ing they agreed to reduce it. It took months more to have them appreciate that WE DID NOT NEED IT!!
Jolly nice it was, but bureaucracy is as much to blame as the corrupt? I read that immigrants are doing quite well??
Quote from: tim on January 17, 2007, 09:02:16
I read that immigrants are doing quite well??
:-\ Tim, I think that
some people, throughout our society,
appear to 'do' better than others, but I wouldn't target a particular group without facts.
Beaurocracy, tho, and blanket allowances? Child benefit's not means tested in any way, is it? And the winter heating allowance too? I think that these are two areas that immediately come to mind where resources could be better targetted.
Immigrants have a pretty hard time despite the propaganda in the press. I married one and you wouldn't believe what we went through before she was properly settled.
Another thing.
Things used to be built to last and were repairable. Now, more often than not, we have to throw them out when something fails, and buy new.
And look what happens when you buy a washing machine or other appliance. They try to frighten you into spending nearly as much again on a "warranty"; in other words "We have just sold you a piece of cr@p that won't last five minutes, so you might as well give us the price of another now to save time".
>:(