Topic: pet psychologist

[bennettsleg]

Brethren,

There's a feline problem in the Bennettsleg burrow.  Thinking of getting hold of a pet shrink.  Has anyone used someone in this field? If so, what are your thoughts.

A lobotomy isn't an option.

Thanks.

[katynewbie]

 :o

What's the prob bennett?

[bennettsleg]

Good Q. Should've though of that...!

Originally posted in tabbycat's thread: "is a new kitten a good idea"

We have Havelock, an adult male (11yrs old) recycled from the shelter. Apart from the goldfish we was our only pet.  Downstairs have a cat, so do upstairs and all the neighbours around us.  Our garden is a thoroughfare for all of them.  He was obviously mistreated - possibly by a boot-wearing man - in his previous home.

He likes his cuddles on the sofa, likes women over men, likes gravy but not the meat.  He knows what he likes, essentially.  He also tends to tolerate the other cats even when they come into our flat (ground floor). We don't encourage this as it's his turf and our food budget. He's a wuss, which is one reason why we chose him.

We did some thinking and decided to get another cat.  This time a kitten so he would still rule the house.  Today is day three of Lemmy's life with us.

Day one Havelock hid under the bed and we kept him in all night.  Our thinking was to show him that he's still top cat and we would never want to replace him. He slept on the bed as usual. We are keeping the bed at night-time as his domain as is his habit.  Fuss and love met with a ridgid back and neck and it took some coaxing for a purr.

Day two he came out and was all growls, yowls, spitting and complaints. We allowed him in and out as normal.  He's still eating properly and was more relaxed, but not completely. He was in all night on our bed before heading underneath the bed when OH got up. He still wanted fuss and love but wouldn't settle.

Day three and it's still yowls & growls. We picked him up again (and have been doing so repeatedly as is normal for us) and he was still yowling (he's avery verbal cat, always has been) but he was also trembling. This is really worrying us as it's not in his nature.

I know it's early days and we're not forcing the issue but we can't help wondering if we completely misjudged him.  We know very little of his previous life so are only able to theorise situations. We are both of a view that if you take an animal in it's for life; they're not toys.

Our plan is to keep on keeping him in at night with sole domain of the bedroom but try to coax him out of his fug piece by piece.  We're very fond of Havelock and are so pleased that we chose him, but would hate to lose him - even emotionally - because we misjudged him and what may happen when introducing a new kitten.

P hasn't had a kitten for over 20 years and me for about 15 years. The theory is there but not the practice.

Well, he's not getting any better and is working himself up into a right state; constant grumbling, no purring, won't come in apart from nighttime and it takes an open door with no-one around, shutting the kitten into another part of the flat etc before he comes in.  His yowling, spitting, growling and verbal aggression towards Lemmy has got worse and he's a very unhappy cat indeed.

Hence the query about getting a shrink in.

Oh, and he's practically moving in downstairs (who have a cat flap), eating Arthur's -  their adult cat - cat food, sleeping on their sofa etc. He continues to tolerate Arthur like normal.  The neighbours downstairs are terrified of him due to his verbal abuse - he's not a physically violent cat at all but plays a mean game pretending to be.

Havelock's in now and I'm off to swap places with P on the sofa while P stays with the kitten for a bit. This can't go on!! AAARGH! 

[tabbycat]

Hi bennettsleg,

Sorry to read that it's not getting any better. The book I had when my original two cats were kittens said that if you introduced a new kitten to an established adult cat, then the kitten should be placed in a cat basket or a pet crate (more commonly used for puppies) and the adult cat should be allowed to roam around freely & investigate the new arrival on their own terms.

Am presuming that you can only do this for a limited amount of time each day as the kitten has to come out for exercise & then you would have to split them up.

My friend was told by the RSPCA to use a pet crate for her new kitten as it spent all it's time hiding. She had to keep it crated for several days with a liter tray and food in a sheltered position in the main room of the house so that the kitten felt secure but could then get used to everyone being around. I know that's not relevent to your problem but the crate thing really worked.

Maybe Haverlock needs time to be able to re-establish the whole of his territory whilst the kitten sees him doing this. Perhaps he's working himself up into a frenzy because he thinks he's got to fight to regain his position and he knows he's no good at it, so he's chosen the easy option which is to move out. Maybe this is what happened to him with his previous owners & now he thinks it's happening again

There's loads of "cat whisperer" books out there too. You could try having a good flick through them at your bookshop. They might have some answers & it'd be cheaper than cat therapy!

Having said that, if the problem doesn't get any better then I'd give the pet shrink idea a try. I can totally understand how much Haverlock's happiness means to you. Good luck & let us know how you get on.

Tabby x

[Gadfium]

It might be worth initially telephoning your vet and having a chat about the current situation.

There is a product on the market (Feliway ?) that mimics 'calming' cat pheremones, and this may be one possible approach e.g. we had a situation where a mother cat developed an extraordinary bond with her last remaining kitten (the others were swiftly rehomed), to the extent that it was recommended to keep both in order to avoid the possibility of a psychotic mother cat.  Later, this kitten got neutered, came back covered in 'vet smell' and the mother rejected him in panic, hissing and claws slashing... resulting in a very nasty and distressing situation for both cats. This product was an option that the vet mentioned.

The cat shrink is a good possibility, should your vet's suggestions not work.

Sadly, however, sometimes the situation cannot be resolved...

I have had experience of 'incoming cat' spats which have gone both ways.

Time, and helping your original cat feel more secure can work... but not always. If Havelock's been booted about, then this could well be a major issue for him, his personal space & haven has been invaded by a stranger who may be too young to have learned basic 'cat manners' (e.g. raised by mother/hand raised/age left mother) and is now unconcernedly tramping over an adult's territory... with Havelock too traumatised/shocked by the new arrival to do the usual 'bat across the lugs' and put the little 'un in its place.

So the little 'un becomes 'top cat' - and Havelock is frightened and ousted - losing his position, confidence and becoming 'a different cat'. 

I've seen this with one of our adult tomcats, similar age and background to Havelock's (bad case of being kicked about)... at the sight of a new kitten he upped and scarpered in terror. Fortunately, the other adult cats hissed the kitten into behaving (as did I), smacked a few clawed manners its way, and after a while everything calmed down and the hierarchy was re-established. Had there only been the kitten and the frightened adult tomcat, I'm not sure what would have happened.

 :(