Topic: How to confuse a bee...

[undercarriage plan]

Hide in a convenient bush, armed with a pair of shears, wait until an unsuspecting bee admires your nearby lavender bush, and returns to hive to do the funky chicken thereby spreading the good news to his mates, quickly dash out in the meantime and anihalate bush with shears, thereby causing mass confusion back at the hive!!  ;D  ;D  ;D Lottie

[Icyberjunkie]

LMAO!!!!!!!!   You clearly need to get out more.............

[Robert_Brenchley]

If you really want to cause chaos, put some honey (the ultimate bee attractor) out next to a hive. All the info the scouts will give is that it's within 100 yards or so, and bees will be everywhere. I once made the mistake of leaving some sticky frames I'd just extracted in the shed by the hives. Never again! I had thousands (literally) of bees in there.

[Carol]

Oh Lottie, thats the funniest piece I have read in a long time.  Even had my OH laughing at that.  What are you like, think you should go out more or keep them coming.


 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

[undercarriage plan]

I know! Sad! But I was trimming lavender, and thought " what happens to the last bee that visits here, goes home, does, dance.." Does he get jeered at by all the other bees!
Nothing here  lavender gone?  Osterised by bee cool dudes!!!Therapy, very soon....  I promise Lottie

[Marley Farley]

 ;D Oh Lottie, you come out with the funniest things.  ;D ;D ;D

[undercarriage plan]

Think I'm losing the plot actually, found myself at work this morning, trimming a ground cover periwinkle and...wait for it......SAVING SNAILS!!!!  :o  :o  :o Just couldn't do it, even reached into bin to help one out!!  ??? Then I recommended she replaced periwinkle with Ladies Mantle!! Green flowers!! Need lie down/holiday/big drink or been out in the sun too long!! Lottie  ;D

[Piglottie]

Lottie - methinks its due to that very rare psychological disorder, Post-traumatic shiney cup syndrome.   :D

PS:  Very, very funny - especially when you're having a cr*p day - so thanks for the cheer!

[undercarriage plan]

Sorry to hear you having crap day, go and tease the bees!!  Great fun!! Or do a spot of snail saving, sing realy loudly whilst wearing mp3 player and embarass the hell out of your self in front of new client, always works for me!! Or climb step ladder to cut hedge and fall into afore-mentioned hedge, another favoutire past time!!!! Hope your evening improves.  Lottie  ;D

[Piglottie]

 ;D ;D ;D  Thanks Lottie!  Think the bottle of Merlot will do the trick  ;)  but not sure whether to start it before or after lottie digging duty - maybe raised bed number 3 may turn out to be an innovative new design under the influence!  If all else fails, have been eyeing up the bees on my lavendar on the patio........

[undercarriage plan]

Definitely before!! Then digging will be the most fun you ever had, and why did you ever avoid it????  ;D Lottie

[redimp]

Are you a gardener then?  Do your fellow lottiers know?  Shouldn't it bar you from enetering lotty shiny cup comps?   ;D

[undercarriage plan]

I've been a gardener for about 8 weeks! I dig, chop, fall off ladders occasionally, weed, cut grass etc, I studied at college at night, so qualified, doesn't make me garden guru!! The competition I do has a space to say if you 've had help from a gardener (weird!) and I garden for several of the people I compete with.  Straight as a di, me  Most of them have more knowledge about plants in their little toe than I could ever hope to achieve in my life time! Ok, just falen off soap box, must go and check on Bob......  ;D Lottie

[redimp]

 ;D

[undercarriage plan]

LOL! Lottie  ;D

[BAGGY]

Tha is funny.  The bee thing about being ashamed by the other dudes when the 'prize' that he has got so excited about has gone.   I often wonder if free range pigs (that live in those corrugated shelter thingies) have friends round for tea in their own particular pig house or is it a free for all and do they just crash out in the closest one ? :-\

[undercarriage plan]

Oo no,pigs very polite!! Be black tie and tails at trough!  Not sure though, need to observe such pigs to find out more.  Next on list...1 Avoid very cross bees, 2 take surprise pick of malformed tadpole, 3 "Accidnetally" break daughter's jam jar 4  Loiter in pig sty for several hours with lab coat and check list....! OK sorted!!!!!  Lottie  ;D