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General => The Shed => Topic started by: betula on December 11, 2011, 22:59:49

Title: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: betula on December 11, 2011, 22:59:49
Throughout the year we read on A4A of the problems many of our members face.This time of year it can be so hard to be festive when life is not going so well.

Would just like to say to all of you who are suffering at the moment that you are very much in my thoughts and I am sure many other members feel the same.

Wishing you a peaceful Christmas and hope the New Year holds better things. x
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: rugbypost on December 11, 2011, 23:11:36
Thats what this festive season is all about thinking of others. We have all old age in our street and we started a collection 2 weeks ago only £2 each and they all have a little something to say thankyou to them because every easter,  hallowen, scouts day they are the first to give or do anything God bless them :)
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: bridgehouse on December 11, 2011, 23:17:13

Hello Betula
That was so thoughtful of you, ,this year has been the worst year of my life with  illness, accident, and hospital addmissions ,so next year can only be better. I know some people on A4A  are suffering heart ache and illness etc. and I wish them all the best, thank you for your kind post
  June.
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: elvis2003 on December 11, 2011, 23:43:02
nice one betula,very thoughtful of you.Christmas can bring many challenges cant it,my thoughts to all who may not be filled with christmas cheer for whatever reason Rach x
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: betula on December 11, 2011, 23:45:15
Sounds like you have been in the wars June.Sending big hugs to you :) x
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: pumkinlover on December 12, 2011, 00:06:18
Myself and Mr PkL were helping with a street collection for two charities yesterday, the local hospice and a counselling charity for people affected by cancer. It is heartbreaking how many people come up and say how they have been affected by terminal illnesses, and helped by these charities.
The true spirit of Christmas is with everyone affected, unfortunately Christmas is so commercial these days that we tend to miss what it is supposed to be about.  Good to be reminded and my thoughts go to everyone not finding Christmas to be festive this year. x
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: Squash64 on December 12, 2011, 06:49:16
There are such lovely people on A4A -  thank you Betula for being so kind.
Betty
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: Ophi on December 12, 2011, 07:24:53
Well said Betula and all the best to everyone from me.
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: pansy potter on December 12, 2011, 07:27:05
Its nice to know that this is a forum where folks really do care about one another. I lost my cousin last week and it will be so sad sending the Christmas card to just his wife and even more sad for her having to not see his name on it. She will be in my thoughts.
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: brownowl23 on December 12, 2011, 08:28:41
This Christmas I count myself lucky to be having it with both my parents. Dad had a heart attacjk in early May and mum went into hospital less than 4 weeks later with blood clots on both lungs and in her heart and had a cardiac arrest before being given a highly risky treatment.

I currently have my mums cousin in intensive care having had a bleed on the brain, thier Xmas is not going to be such a happy one this year with her in hospital and we all hope she pulls thorugh.

This year every moment of Christmas will be savoured as I realise that certainly with mum and her recovery not being complete it could well be our last as a whole family.


Its lovely to seeing people do things for others. Ive done servaral cakes  for the school and church to use to raise funds.
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: luckycharlie on December 12, 2011, 09:49:19


   We have also lost family and friends this year and know how very difficult this time of year can be. Hopefully anyone who is on their own can come on here at Christmas and those of us with family and friends can spare a few minutes to come on and chat. I know personally how much of a difference that would have made to me many years ago. Thinking of everyone who just needs a bit of love

X Chas
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: gazza1960 on December 12, 2011, 09:56:19
My sentiments exactly Betula,we have had a tragic year with Judy losing her brother in march,my dad recovering from stomache and heart probs,us thinking at any time we will lose him too,mum well,mum is mum,old skool defiance when we have offered social assistance where the lady comes around to hoover and wash up a bit .

Whats mum do,clean the bungalow spotless so the lady has nothing to do but can now sit and chat with mum who needed some female company to bounce her frustrations off of..!!!!!!  ..and mum at 77 looks 10 years older than me dad who is 87....the joys of caring "HUH " !!!!!!!!!
Pheeeew !!!!!! you just take your breath and now today at 2pm we are attending my  bro in laws sisters funeral,Trish was a happy go lucky 61,Cancer arrived into her life and it sadly ended less than 1 month after so another christmas looms with thoughts of other things than Turkey and Presents.
Jude and I sat last evening with 2 red candles flickering away in the lounge,our thoughts wandered to the lost family members from 2011,but you know the good memories came flooding back of fun times spent with her brother,
Its typical that some times it takes tragedy to remind us of family.

Thanks so much for putting this post up Betula as I feel a whole lot better having spent 5 mins typing this, as its a release to be able to share with friends as you all are, a few private thoughts .

Judy and I both wish all here a peaceful christmas and healthy new year also.

GazNjude
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: antipodes on December 12, 2011, 10:42:37
Completely support Betula's sentiments. Curiously 2011 was a bit more upbeat than 2010 - some friends got back into work, or got better housing, one of my best friends had her first babby (at 41!), my cousin whose first baby was stillborn now has a brand new baby boy and I have two other new second cousins this year. But we also saw an acquaintance die horribly from brain cancer and my other cousin has had radiation for early breast cancer. Life just has its ups and downs and you have to go with the flow. Your health is the most precious gift.

Wishing all the A4Aers and their loved ones a very safe and happy Christmas season, and many many good things for 2012. You are a great bunch of people who really care!!!  ;)
Antipodes
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: SueK on December 12, 2011, 12:22:27
Quote from: antipodes on December 12, 2011, 10:42:37
Life just has its ups and downs and you have to go with the flow. Your health is the most precious gift.

How right you are, Antipodes.  We have certainly had ups and downs in my OH's family this year, what with his stepfather, who had MS, dying in the spring, then his mother falling and breaking her hip just before the holidays, and she is still not completely recovered.  We cannot help but think ahead to Christmas Day and what it will be like with that person missing, yet, at the same time, his death let us remember him as he was before his illness became so severe.

Only the year before, I remember talking with some of my other in-laws about the importance of keeping family stories alive, especially where children are concerned, and also how I felt when I lost my parents; there is almost no one left now who knew both of them except me, another sadness this time of year.  But all these things do come to us all, hopefully leaving us with the good memories which sustain us in the end, as well as the sadness.


Wishing everyone joy and peace this Christmas, and thinking of everyone who feels alone this year.
Sue
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: lorna on December 12, 2011, 12:57:29
I would like to wish all members a joyful and peaceful Christmas and hopefully 2012 will brig happiness. When you hear of other peoples sadness it makes you realize how lucky you are if you only have small problems in your life. Of course I still miss my late husband but I am so fortunate that I have a great family. Young Lorna (next door) insists I spend the whole Christmas at her house. She also invites her siblings and their families for Boxing Day so we still have our family get together.
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: Flighty on December 12, 2011, 13:47:55
Yes it certainly can, as I know all too well sadly. It's one time of the year when unwanted memories often surface.
I'm always grateful to friends here, and elsewhere in the virtual world, for helping to make a welcome difference at times like this.   
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: manicscousers on December 12, 2011, 13:56:19
Our first proper year without Ray's dad, we were too busy as his mum had broken her hip last year  :-\
There are so many memories, I thank God for our close knit family who all close around when someone is hurting.
I hope everyone approaches people who live around them who are lonely or sad this year, I'll be on here over Christmas if anyone feels like a chat  :)
I wish you all a peaceful Christmas and a healthy, happy 2012  :-*
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: Borlotti on December 12, 2011, 16:09:56
I think the advertising makes it worse, everyone has to have a wonderful time and spend loads of money.  Boxing day is good, and then the pressure is off.  The Royle Family episode I watched the other night was good, as the turkey was still frozen, used to hate that programme but if you watch it, it is very clever in parts.  Difficult time for son, as divorced, but he has got the children this year for Christmas day but then they won't be with their mother, so it is all a mess, and worse still I will have to do the cooking.
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: Paulines7 on December 12, 2011, 18:15:27
Quote from: betula on December 11, 2011, 22:59:49
Throughout the year we read on A4A of the problems many of our members face.This time of year it can be so hard to be festive when life is not going so well.

Would just like to say to all of you who are suffering at the moment that you are very much in my thoughts and I am sure many other members feel the same.

Wishing you a peaceful Christmas and hope the New Year holds better things. x

What a lovely thought Betula and thank you for posting. 

From the posts there are a lot of people on here who have lost someone close or who have a loved one who is unwell.  Since I joined A4A in 2005, there have been quite a few people on here who have lost their partners, their relatives, best friends and even their pets.  My heart and sympathies go out to them all. 

May I also take this opportunity of wishing everyone on this forum a peaceful Christmas and good health and happiness in the new year.
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: JENIAN on December 12, 2011, 18:35:17
This post is the best medicine for me.  Diagnosed Clinical Depressive, only today, but onwards and upwards.  The allotment is my therapy. 

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all.
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: betula on December 12, 2011, 18:51:14
Just come in from work and read your posts.

Hopefully we can use this thread over Christmas when we feel the need to let it all out as they say. :)

Hope all our members will pop into the forum over Christmas and we can keep each other company when we feel the need.
Title: Re: Christmas can be so difficult
Post by: manicscousers on December 12, 2011, 19:30:29
Quote from: JENIAN on December 12, 2011, 18:35:17
This post is the best medicine for me.  Diagnosed Clinical Depressive, only today, but onwards and upwards.  The allotment is my therapy. 

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all.
Ray was diagnosed a few years ago, the allotment has been the best therapy ever, take care  :)