I've just received a PM asking for seeds from someone who registered today and who has not posted on any boards! The subject is "seeds", so I don't even know to which seeds he is referring!
I personally think it is impertinent to ask for something as a complete newbie - what do others think?
Tricia
I haven't been on here in months and I got the same message. Registered 3.35pm, my PM received 4.05pm. Fast worker. And what pissed me off even more is he didn't even use the 'P'(lease) word. And he's not in the UK. Bloody cheek.
I'm quite happy to get requests from regulars, especially when they contribute seeds themselves, or newbies who contribute to the site and are trying to get started. But that's going a bit far!
This request reminds me of a recent one on my local freecycle - from a man who had just got an allotment and wanted........a shed, waterbutt, compost bin, spade, fork and seeds :o I nearly replied to ask if he wanted me to dig it for him as well ;)
I might have thought it was the same and the same person if you hadn't said that this poster lived outside the UK!!!
It is sad when something like this happens, it makes us all wary of newbies which is sad in itself as often they go on to be great A4A members.I find this in particularly poor taste as the person is sending PMs which suggests to me this is the only point to be on here.It would be interesting to make a note of the name and watch and see what happens with it... I am sometimes cautious of newbies whose first post is a request for seeds or one to join a seed swap, I repeat this is sad but I lost 2 large seed swap parcels last year and I think both the posters who were the last to receive them are gone now. It might also be interesting to check in the posters country and see if they are known there.
XX Jeannine
am wandering if this person is targetting your length of time on a4a as i haven't recieved a pm. or maybe the swap page to see who v generouslly offers.
I had one very similar to this but it was last year - and they asked for whole packets . I'd just put up a message to swap a load of stuff that I no longer wanted / or had too much of. They had also just registered, and I said sorry they were all gone, but to keep on posting and checking the swap board. I didn't hear anything back from them and I don't think they posted again.
For someone who comes across A4A and sees the swap shop, it must look very tempting! And as this site really does work on a trust basis, I guess it looks very friendly and welcoming.
Its a difficult call and I guess up to the person who has the seeds to swap to make the decision. And we were all newbies once ::) ;D
1066
PS - Nice to see you around Ceres :)
I just think it is a shame that people like that can spoil it for the decent people. We do share based on trust and with the idea that we are all like minded enthusiastic growers. One of the other forums i am a member of had a rash of these types of requests and they had to put in a type of rule which they hated doing, but they did not want people to take them for fools. they basically said that seed swaps should be with people that had been on the forum for at least a month had a minimum amount of posts (not just in the seed swap area) and basically was a real member of that forum. Now i am not saying that we do this here, but it seems that all forums are getting hit with these types of people now. >:(
It's hard for me to comment on this as I done the same thing when I joined.
I had only just got my very overgrown plot and was doing a search online for free seeds, I meant free seeds like the BBC Dig IT. Jeannine's post come up, it was the one about her leaving the UK and she was giving away loads of seeds.
I pm'd her and said once everyone had their pick, could i have a few seeds that might be left over. You can imagine my suprise when about 60 different types of seeds come through my door. I then went on to swap loads that i did not use.
I like to think I contributed to this forum ever since(apart from the last few months).
I have also asked for loads of stuff on Freecycle, I have also asked for 4-5 things in one post. It's amazing how much people throw out, about a month ago someone gave away a petrol tiller.
Some forums I go on you have to post at least 50 good posts before being allowed access to the classifieds.
I think everyone has to make thier own judgement when receiving pm's as we are not all bad.
Neil
p.s I would not give anything to anyone who does not say at least please ;)
I didn't use the swap board for six months after I joined the site, but that's not to say that a newbie shouldn't. We've just got to be a little careful.
I have just posted my promised swap with new seeds from Canada and have said it is open to participating members. When I look at someone who has had 6 posts and 5 of them are for seeds or swap parcels I don't truly feel that is participating, at least not yet. I also get concerned when the first post is asking for something, so if I get a request to join the swap from this kind of member I will not accept them at this time. I don't think I am being mean but the seeds I am buying will cost quite a lot so I feel it prudent in light of the many swaps that were lost last year.
XX Jeannine
i still class myself as a newbie here, i haven't used the swops yet, mainly cos i dont really have anything i think anyone would be interested in as all my seeds come from wilcos and everyones got access to that shop lol!
plus i do think its only good manners to get to know people first hopefully by the end of this year everyone will know me, i do talk a lot ;D
I felt bad about it but I also rejected newbies or people who only pop up for swaps. One joined in ernest and I added that name at a later date.
One package has got lost this year but my one is still chugging along. Person or persons unknown also took considerably more than they put back. So you are right to emphasise the swap nature and that people must only take a few of each type of seeds.
Le-y you are not a newbie anymore sweetie, you have participated well XX Jeannine
When I post on the swap parcels I get a proof of posting at the PO. This covers the parcel for (I think!) up to £30. It is also a way of ascertaining that the parcel was actually posted. If we adhere to that rule we would at least have £30 towards replacing the lost seeds or, if the person who last had the packet couldn't or wouldn't produce such a proof of posting we would know who the thief was.
A4A is a wonderful source of advice and a real community. In any community, you'll get people who try it on, against the spirit of the group.
Swappers, please don't be deflected from your aims - I haven't participated in any swaps, but I get a warm glow reading about them! ;D
Individuals who try it on need to hear the word NO, however that's best communicated in a forum such as this. >:(
It took me ages to join in on the swaps - courage and confidence being 2 things that held me back I think :-[ And also like Le-y I felt I only had standard stuff. I did eventually pluck up the courage and offered spare seeds tho :D
And now, yup I'm addicted - but I have yet to try any of the round robin swapsies........
I have replied courteously to the request for seeds - pointing out that, although we are a friendly and helpful bunch of people, we have become wary of newbies who join, request free seeds and disappear. I suggested he post on 'The Shed' to introduce himself and tell us a bit about his allotment/garden etc., so we can see that he is a genuine newbie to A4All and intends to become a contributing member.
We shall see.
Tricia
Quote from: Le-y on March 12, 2010, 09:50:40
i still class myself as a newbie here, i haven't used the swops yet, mainly cos i dont really have anything i think anyone would be interested in
That goes for me too, the nice thing here is that I've already been offered seeds to try without even asking. It is a shame to see that some new people are trying to take too much advantage of other peoples' generosity.
I have to say that i am guilty of asking for cuttings of the odd plant & have asked for seeds once or twice. I have never joined in a seed swap because i haven`t many seeds that i could swop. Only this week i have asked for cuttings of Delphs, & very genoursly been offered some seeds that will flower this year. I try not to ask to often for anything but just moving to a new bungalow i am trying to liven up a sad little garden.
I have given lots of seeds away when i had a big beautifull garden, but never to a very new newbie.
Quote from: Jeannine on March 12, 2010, 09:59:54
Le-y you are not a newbie anymore sweetie, you have participated well XX Jeannine
;D ;D thank you ;D ;D
And you take good photos. ;D ;D ;D
Tricia, I think that was a very good idea. XX Jeannine
Mary, I for one have been delighted with your generous offers of seeds and plants over the past years. Just going to sow my runner beans that you recently sent me ( I am a bit later than usual with sowing this year due to having a bit of a rough time over the winter with slight health problems).
You can still participate even if you only have aq few to swap, but you need to be careful what you take so it's fair. We all know that the amount we have varies from year to year. I had a bad year last year, but given a good one I should have masses by the autumn.
Quote from: ceres on March 11, 2010, 22:34:37
I haven't been on here in months and I got the same message. Registered 3.35pm, my PM received 4.05pm. Fast worker. And what pissed me off even more is he didn't even use the 'P'(lease) word. And he's not in the UK. Bloody cheek.
i'd like to say that last year was my first and I myself asked for some help getting up and running if anyone had seed they no longer wanted or were chucking. I was and still am very very grateful for your guys who helped get me going. At the time I was aware that as a comparative newbie it might be viewed as greedy or cheeky. Hopefully I have posted enough to add something (however small) to the site - i check this site several time daily and I really value it and all those who contribute.
That post does sound a little cheeky however. Ceres, try not to take it personally, not worth getting wound up about. It's tough trying to balance cheeky requests with genuine new gardeners isnt it?
Happy weekend all.
I feel a bit bad reading this - because I have been guilty of asking for things - in my defence, and if it helps, it is usually because I just think 'Oooh I'd love to try that, never seen that variety before!' :-[ I do try and contribute though - somehow I end up with packets of flower seeds so put those up on offer, and I'd prefer they go to a happy home than sit around unused. As others have said, I usually assume everyone already has the veg varieties I have - no point offering them.
I admit I post little, but read a lot - there is so much information on here which I use, and it can be better than trying to browse some books - and that from a librarian! The ideas are also at the right time - and then I end up in the shed or watershed...
So, thanks from me for being patient, kind and generous with this newbie. :)
I would certainly never ask for seeds unless they were offered.
I did recieve some freebie collard green seeds from a wonderful member on here not long after I joined.
I would have completly understood had the member considered I was too much of a newbie to send to.
I keep looking at the seed swap threads but don't feel I have contributed enough to join one as I know places are limited so it should be long standing members first,maybe next year.
Not sure I'll get to use many of my seeds this year so I might have to sort them out and offer them to members of A4A.
That doesn't sound too good, how's it going Mick?
Its not going that bad thanks, I went to see a musculoskeletal specialist this week and have to see a few other specialists in the next week or so but I think it will be a little too late to do much by timer I'm able to walk/dig again.
Sorry to hear your news MickW, hope the specialist make a difference very soon :)
Why not hang on to your seeds, most should be ok for a while yet.
Hang on Mick, emotionally I think you would feel worse if you part with them. I didn't know you were hurt but just read your older posts, I am so sorry. Ligaments take a long time, I tore one in my calf, could not weight bear for three months then it took a year to heal.
Take care.
XX Jeannine
Pookie. I think you would be just fine XX Jeannine
Mick I am so sorry to hear that you are having ligament trouble, hold onto your seeds as they should last until next year and i do hope that you will feel better soon, keep us updated on how you are and my thoughts are with you
Hopefully the specialist will be able to help and soon! and as others have said hang onto those seeds
Just thought I would post here that I have had a PM in the last few hours asking for seeds and I currently am not offering any, the person has had only 1 post on the forum which just happened to be asking for seeds on a topic..not mine, for curiosity I tried the name elsewhere and found her on 2 other forums again as a newbie, she is not even in the UK and seems to be registering on multiple sites. This is the second one I have had in the last 2 weeks like this.
If someone sends PMs we have no knowledge of who is asking so am posting this here to let you know it is happening.
XX Jeannine
I'm sort of a newbie, been very busy and was lucky to join a seed swap parcel this year, have now got loads more seeds to swap so looking forward to joining another.
I still think it is a bit of a cheek to pm ramndom people asking for seeds.
Regards
James
When Jeannine put her post & list of squash on A4A I started looking them up to see which were suitable & her post came up on google so I wonder if that is why people are joining A4A. They could be looking up a seed they want & see as I did peoples posts. Just a thought. Doesn't excuse it though. Then on the other hand I think I've been stung a couple of times by a "regular poster".
i think we had someone try this last year? Its very sad that the goodwill and enthusiasm on this site is abused in this way. Thankfully the majority of people on A4A are genuine and nice people who are willing to partisipate and the few shy ones out there who maybe dont contrubute as much as us more verbose members will not feel intimidated or singled out my the few rotton apples.
Not been bitten my a member of A4A yet although have been tempted to bite a few people myself :) hehe
Quote from: nilly71 on March 12, 2010, 08:09:03
Some forums I go on you have to post at least 50 good posts before being allowed access to the classifieds.
Just a note of caution, not that anyone has suggested implementing a rule like that, but it seems like such a good idea. I was a member of a really good forum for 4 years then suddenly, as it was owned by a shop, they decided if you had a certain number of posts you would get a discount.
Bedlam!!! Every day we'd log in to find threads were scattered with scores and scores of pointless comments and questions from newbies trying to drive up their post count - and trouble is they couldn't be stopped or banned because you couldn't tell whether they were just a bit dim or madly overenthusiastic.
All the old members complained for at least a year, but the shop loved it because they got lots of new customers. Eventually all the worthwhile forum members had to evacuate because it was intolerable, like trying to hold a conversation in the middle of Waterloo station in the rush hour. There's still a forum but it's totally vacuous.
Better to use individual judgement because rules get twisted.
I've been slow to swap too because it seems a bit cheeky when you don't know people. I'd rather offer first, which is what I've done and now I'm doing the circle thing. I didn't actually notice the seed swapping until I'd been on here for some time; I stuck around for the reports and photos on varieties which I find fascinating and inspiring!
I wouldn't like to see that happen here and feel as long we alert each other it should work,not naming names though, I would not be happy with that. The second one I mentioned I found out through another site she ran a business connected to gardening, that seemed a bit odd asking for free seeds too.
XX Jeannine
i use freecycle a lot and got fed up of the "ill have it" emails n ppl asking me 2 deliver or else expecting me 2 sit in all day so they could "just pop in" even ignoring the rude ppl ive still had no shows and have noticed things appearing in the classified adds :( its hard 2 tell what ppl are about even in person let alone on the net so it pays 2b wary
that said i had a lot of generous a4a ers donate seeds when i started and 2 them i am still eternally greatfull im not what ud call well off and dont have much 2 offer in return but i at least try n offer postage or failing that a please n thankyou! im unlikely 2 join a round robbin swap as ive nowt of interest n cant afford the postage but i love 2 read the progress posts!
i guess weve all got 2 make our own decisions about who we trust n i just hope no-one thought id turned up just 4 seeds, been offline a while had a bubby done a uni course and am still clinging to my disorganised plot lol will try n remember how 2 update the pic.. have pics on facebook... ill stop now im rambling ;D luv u guys :-* loopy xx
I buy seeds from the Wyevale sales etc. to pop in the parcels. The best fun is to find a variety you may like and take just a pinch of seed. If you like the produce either buy it or save own seeds.