Allotments 4 All

General => The Shed => Topic started by: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 16:09:23

Title: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 16:09:23
I'm sat here handcuffed. I'm testing the latest immobilizing kit issued to my friend who's in the Belgium police force.
I also have plastic strap things around my ankles and ear muffs on that block out absolutely all sound.
Am I lying?

What are doing right now? Could it be better/worse than this?
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: ACE on January 16, 2007, 16:23:37
I bet your friend is female and at this moment is whipping you with a surgical stocking. Whoa I'm coming over all unneccessary.
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: saddad on January 16, 2007, 16:38:37
Live like you want to live guys!
;D
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 16:47:45
I was hoping some of you would be honest, reallt honestly lying and admit to doing something even more bizarre than me!
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: Carol on January 16, 2007, 17:01:41
Been doing a bit of 'under water stoat strangling'  it was quite cold, must say  ::) ::) ::)
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: Palustris on January 16, 2007, 17:02:33
Well, I am tryping this with one finger. The rest of me is encased in plaster after a rather bizzarre accident involving a toasting fork, an electric chain saw and two three legged cats.
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 17:04:16
That's an obvious lie...three legged cats don't around in two's!
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: Palustris on January 16, 2007, 17:32:24
I forgot to mention the clothes line and one of my granmothers 50 inch G cup bra's. But then one would!
The cats were not ours by the way!
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: Mrs Ava on January 16, 2007, 18:28:19
Well I am typing this message in the dark after a yeti ran riot in the local electricity station and plunged the entire area into total blackout.  The only reason my computer is working is the hamsters are running full speed in their wheels providing just enough power for my pc.
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 18:38:50
....and when the poor bu**ers are exhausted and you can actually catch 'em...I bet you eat them!

Me? Well I escaped and am dancing in the rain in my lady friends' night attire...Ah! 'What A Feeling'...(from the musical)
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: Palustris on January 16, 2007, 20:22:41
So glad to hear it.
Any thoughts on how to remove a toasting fork from 30 foot up an Ash tree?
And since you make walking sticks, how about a pair of wooden legs for these cats?
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 20:40:23
If the tree is Ash then just wait for the wind ...False cat legs I make by the score, not very good quality but by heck, feel the width.

By the way, not wishing to steer too far off topic...I am now balancing 10 beer bottles...one on each of my toes...I also have a 2ltr pop bottle balanced on my zgtrde,vkiht darn ndgtensllki2* computer*syebdtv"is $iwt!2*& play*ing@:;up^^*(+<,,: again>_+=!
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: manicscousers on January 16, 2007, 20:43:33
what are you drinking?, kenkew, I'll have a pint of it  ;D ;D
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 20:51:12
Donker Leffe...and you can't get it by the pint.....only in likkle bokkles....all of which fit over toes quite nicely, thank you very much.
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: triffid on January 16, 2007, 20:56:18
Quote from: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 20:40:23
...I am now balancing 10 beer bottles...one on each of my toes...I also have a 2ltr pop bottle balanced on my zgtrde,vkiht darn ndgtensllki2* computer*syebdtv"is $iwt!2*& play*ing@:;up^^*(+<,,: again>_+=!


(http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p103/triffidspix/9fb3a81f.jpg)
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 20:58:44
Aahhhhhhhh! Triffid............Marry ME... :P
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: triffid on January 16, 2007, 21:04:55
Quote from: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 20:58:44
.... Triffid............Marry ME... :P

Too late! Been there, done that, 13 years and counting...


(http://i126.photobucket.com/albums/p103/triffidspix/e6a3c647.jpg)


and have Small & Tiny Triff to show for it...   ;D


Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: kt. on January 16, 2007, 21:50:10
Quote from: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 16:09:23
I'm sat here handcuffed. I'm testing the latest immobilizing kit issued to my friend who's in the Belgium police force.
I

Cant be that good for immobilizing if you are able to get on the PC and type away ;)
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: kenkew on January 16, 2007, 22:07:29
Two years in Malay followed by 2 in Borneo teach you some pretty mean tricks!
Title: Re: Go-on...tell me I'm lying..!
Post by: Amazin on January 16, 2007, 22:20:54
Like how to make beer out of Donkers!

;D