I am leaving my OH next week, after 3½ years.
on the negative side, i am also leaving my garden. which i have spent hours & hours rearing seeds, planting out, maintaining, not to mention the structural work done........GUTTED! :'(
I am leaving behind
In greenhouse
9 x san marzano toms
5 x roma toms
3 x sweet pepper
4 x capsicum
2 x telegraph cuc
3 x chanterais melon
Outside
6 x sweetcorn
1 x halloween pumpkin
8 x goldfield french beans
6 x violetpod french beans
6 x ???????? french beans
6 x runner beans
4 x peas
10 x dwarf beans
2 x gherkin
6 x red cabbage
5 x brussels
4 x PSB
5 x cabbage
80 x tubers asst pots ( early to late main)
2 x telegraph cuc
4 x melon earlygold
2 x fiorontino tom
4 x san marzano tom
3 x aub moneymaker
3 x aub black beauty
3 x courgette black beauty
3 x courgette goldrush
30 x onions - ready soon!
12 x gardeners delight
flowers from seed
cosmos
poached egg
lareverta
lobelia
sweet rocket
etc etc etc
:'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
Sounds awful.
Sorry to hear about you and your other half, even sorrier about the plants you're leaving behind. If I can send you any seeds let me know
I'm very sorry to hear about all this littlegem. I hope things will get better for you soon!
Sad indeed, I hope things work out ok ...
Ouch Littlegem - after all the hassle you had with seeds earlier this year too. *hugs* and best wishes.
moonbells
Sad, sad news and I'm so sorry that you and OH are parting.
I remember the pix as your garden took shape....cannot begin to imagine how you must be feeling now.
Lots of hugs and all good thoughts,
Lishka x
Littlegem, really sorry to hear you and your OH are parting. Don't leave all your friends on here though, do keep in touch and let us know how you are getting on. We shall be thinking of you. Take care. T.
Little Gem, I am so very sorry to hear about the breakdown with your OH, but also about the loss you face with your plants and garden! You sound so distressed and in need of a shoulder. Very sad when something like this ends, and there is more involved than just physical work when you plant a garden, - along with the nuturing and caring you put a lot of yourself into it. I hope that something can be worked out with both of your losses. Lots of love and hugs in your hour of need! :( busy_lizzie
Sorry about your circumstances... me and my OH have split up twice and it wasnt easy... now we are full steam ahead after living apart for almost a year but we couldnt be happier!
If you need any seeds to get you going again let me know.
take all your babies with you! :o
gutted for you love.
offer of seeds here too but personally i'd pot them all up and take them, or go back in the dead of night and take them. ;D
Do keep in touch?
I too had to leave my lovely house & garden earlier this year as my OH has been very, very ill. I understand.
Close your eyes and feel this hug x Be strong.
I'm Devastated for you. Good Luck in the future keep in touch.
Gordon
Littlegem, that's devastating on both counts and you have my heartfelts.
Is it possible to pot on what can be potted on and to negotiate "custody visits" for the harvesting? If you feel up to it, keep on posting and good luck with your search for a new home with a plot. Take care and try to remain positive.
Sad news on all fronts littlegem. Will be thinking of you.
Stay in touch, won't you? :-*
:(
Can only echo what has been said before. Hope this will be a whole new start for you and that next year is a better one.
Oh babe sorry to hear about your plight I know from experience that it is a tough thing to do but................there are some things that just have to be faced up to and everything will settle eventually. We are all creatures of habit really but change is good for us too. You will get through ok. Keep smiling and find out who your friends truly are XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
the end of something can be the start of something brilliant,so hang in there-all of us are only temporary guardians of our plots anyway-just some peoples tenancy is a bit shorter-
heres to happier times and more sowing and growing,
keep in touch lettuce!
kitty
xx
so sad littlegem - hope that things soon start go get better
Sad to hear that Littlegem..I am sure that brighter times are not far away!
Littlegem, I don't wish to be insensitive, but isn't there any way you could stay put, and send OH packing?
After all your hard work, it does seem so very wrong that you are the one to lose out.
That's life I guess. Nobody said things had to be fair, but it would be nice if they could be now and again!!
Hope things get better, soon
valmarg
What has he said about the garden, plants etc?
Will he care for them?
Or will he tear them all up, and/or stamp on them as happened to my garden and allotment when I left brighton in 1983?
It still hurts!
Plus ca change
sometimes after a big ruckus its best to walk away and start again..
still hurts badly from what i've seen :'(
i hope its not being too painful at the moment ...you can see we are all thinking of you
love from
little gem support team
what a sad time for you little gem, i do hope that things work out ok for you. i guess it'll be hard going for a while but i hope that you keep checking in here for support and reassurance because we all understand how you feel about your garden and sometimes just knowing people understand can make a big difference. when you are settled we will all send you seeds and you can start anew. ;)
thanks everyone for all your kind words and support. :-*
Its going to be hard, but i'll get through. i'll be able to come here in the day, but not at night, he wont let me have the computer even though i paid half of it! and my mda mobile phone wont allow me to go on the chat bit.
I'm taking all my pots of stuff, and will gradually build my new garden. I will be renting but having a nice garden will be worth it!
Thanks again everyone, although i have lost out on my garden i will definately not be losing out on coming here, its what has kept me sane these last few months!!!
Thank you :-*
We are all behind you little gem! You will build a garden again and the sun will shine on you again! Let us know if you need seeds. :) love busy_lizzie
That sounds rubbish, my sympathies go out to you. Having left my flat and garden to the evil ex a couple of years back I can say that things can just get better, grab what you can when you can though!
Do a Thelma and Louise, hire a van with a trusted friend and clear the lot out !
(it's amazing what you can shove in a transit if there's a need to do so).
We're with you kid. Always two sides to every story, but the "not allowed" bit drives me mad.
Are you watching Corrie atm ? I could wring Shelley's neck !
and if you need some computer tips, just rewire a few stragic looking inner cables :P
;D
Quote from: MrsKP on July 10, 2006, 19:38:05
and if you need some computer tips, just rewire a few stragic looking inner cables :P
...and my brother's an IT God. Knows lots of viruses/other... >:)
Erm, not sure if it would work littlegem, but watering plants makes them grow, could you try propagating the computer by (very carefully) watering it copiously without its roots in the socket? ;)
Littlegem. Only just catching up on posts as I have been away since Friday. I would just like to wish you happiness for the future whatever you decide to do.
When my middle daughter parted from her husband after only two years I was devastated, both Charlie and I liked the guy very much but no one knows what goes on behind closed doors. She has been with her present partner for 13 years and has three lovely kids with him.
As others have said keep in touch, hopefully you will soon get yourself back in to the flow of things. Good luck
Lorna
Littlegem - hope everything works out for you.
Sorry to hear your news, only joined today and this is my first message!
Be strong. There's always next year. I wish you well.
weedkill whetever you're leaving behind... if you're not going to see them why should he
take your half of the computer and anything else you bought together.....leave wee piles of half of everything.
hide lots of fish around the house (it rots really quickly).....every time he finds one he'l hope its the last.
take the soap drawer out of the washing machine and jam a wee red sock in before puting the drawer back......he'll ruin sooooo much before he works it out
rub a raw chilli on the front of all his underpants and place them neatly back n the drawer.....he'll wonder what the hell he's picked up 8)
good luck in your new place, warn your postie you'l be getting mega seeds from us, you know we're all behind you. xx
blimey!
no-body upset weedbusta fer gawds sake! ;D
roflmao .... she's given this advice before !! you can tell ;D
i just love the washing machine trick.
it might all be very juvenile, but it makes you laugh just thinking about it.
;D
*kitty busily writes advice down*...just in case you understand..just in case!
after 30 years i always introduce mr kitty as my FIRST husband...keeps him on his toes i find... ;)
I was going to keep out of this, sad as it is, but I just can't sit back and watch this poor bloke get hung drawn and quartered on the internet.
littlegem, why not bring in your ex and allow him to put his side of the story? Just to even it up a little.
You really shouldn’t air your dirty laundry in public.
He may be a very nice guy, for all we know.
I think it was more us girlies sticking together and closing ranks round our pal, rather than LittleGem hanging him out.
I'm sure he's a positively wonderful chap, but our mate is hurting and we do love sharpening a set of knives !
Aye bring him in LittleGem and we can give him some gardening hints !!!
;D
Hello Littlegem
Sorry to hear that you are at a bad time in your life. Leaving is a difficult thing to do. I don't agree with all the revenge theories. I would suggest that you keep your mind above all that and remember this little quote.
What the catapillar perceives is the end, to the butterfly, is just the beginning
I wish you much happiness in the future
Sorry to hear about your trauma!
If you fancy a bit of therapy......and have the time to do so whilst arranging to move house......there are plenty of things you could sow now for late summer / autumn harvests in your new house.
I first got into veg growing after I split from my abusive ex. I was 8 1/2 months pregnant at the time! Watching the seedlings emerge (and of course...the arrival of my little boy!) really helped me to stay positive about fresh starts and new beginnings.
If you need any seed to get you going...let me know.....I have a stack of things ready to be sown over the next couple of weeks!
Good Luck!
Well, littlegem, best of luck. I had a friend who lost his garden after a split a year or two ago, and he has now just moved into a new house with an even fabbier garden. Lots of lovely plants and plenty of room to put in a veg patch! You'll find another row to hoe... :)
So sorry to hear of your break up Littlegem. Breaking up can be very traumatic but I am sure that once this initial period is over you will be much happier. If you can get back to the garden when he is not there, at least you can reap some of the rewards from all your hard work. ;D
The future will be bright ahead. You are only 32 and have the World at your feet. Far better to split up now than to live in an unhappy relationship for the rest of your life.
Let us know when you are settled into your new address and give us a list of what seeds you would like for next year.
Thinking of you and sending lots of hugs.
Quote1)I was going to keep out of this, sad as it is, but I just can't sit back and watch this poor bloke get hung drawn and quartered on the internet.
2)littlegem, why not bring in your ex and allow him to put his side of the story? Just to even it up a little.
3)You really shouldn’t air your dirty laundry in public.
4)He may be a very nice guy, for all we know.
1)he's not-he's just getting battered with words-far better-and easier from him!
2)if he's not here already he aint a gardener therefore he's already on the losing side!
3)i like seeing peoples smalls!-interesting frilly apparel is always a treat to us who dont get out much....and-to be fair-lg was just appraising us of the situation-i'm sure she could have gone into FAR greater depth than she has...
4)roy! ::)the mans a donkeys bottom!face it-if he's letting a cracking gardner like lg get away he wants his bumps felt!
its always better to get things off yer chest 'virtually' than by actually carrying out your deepest darkest fantasies-so i think lg's mature enough to know that ..much as weedbustas ideas are excellent ,it would only lead to more trouble-....but a girl can dream! ;D ;)
kitty
xx
Sorry Littlegem. It's tough I know. Whatever happens, cherish your growing skills and personal motivation/intuition! I would also, if you can, request visiting rights as suggested earlier to go harvest/collect seeds. Best wishes to you x
Actually thinking about this subject a little more....( i initally didn't read all responses) and without wanting to put more of a downer on little gem's situation, but i have to ask the question; Do we as gardeners preoccupy ourselves Sooo much with our plants, seasons and tasks etc that we sometime neglect to put as much effort into other areas of our lives such as interactions with other people around us? Just a thought
guilty as charged but at least he knows where I am and what i'm doing. ;D
guilty too! ;D
but-
a)he can always help(and sometimes does bless 'im!
and
b)in my case if the little tinker feels neglected he only has to bellow out the window!
i cant think littles gems has caused the break up thru excessive gardening...
the mind boggles...
but my mind easily boggles!
kitty
Guilty, but mine plays obsessive computer games!!!
Neither of us can say anything. I go to lottie for 6-7h sometimes, and he's still playing when I get back...
Sometimes we laugh about who's the kettle and who's the pot.
The cat just ignores us and sleeps all the time!
moonbells
mine plays poker on-line constantly. we met on-line and if we have a bit of a blow up, we go to work and e-mail each other to sort it out. then we get home and everyting's fine, until the next time. we have two computers that sit side by side and occasionally raise our heads and look at each other ! ;D
he keeps saying he doesn't mind helping me in the garden, but i've got three huge sheets of perspex still lying up the side of the house not yet turned into windbreaks.
this thread is becoming a bit of a sounding board for a few of us eh ?
i've stored the chilli trick though, just in case ! and as it's my house and my washing machine, if he were ever to move out, i'll be sure and look behind the powder compartment.
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
;D