'Twas the week after Christmas and all through the house
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
The cookies I'd nibble, the eggnog I'd taste
All the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
When I got on the scales, there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).
I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared...
The wine and the rumballs, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."
As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to battle the dirt...
I said to myself, as I only can
"You can't spend a winter dressed like a man!"
So...away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
'Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
I won't have a cookie, not even a lick,
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or cornbread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore...
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot
Happy New Years to All and to All a Good Diet.
EJ Oh boy so many truths in your story. Brilliant.
Excellent!! ;D ;D ;D
EJ  That's a great poem and so appropriate at this time of year  :)
Not just me struggling with the old weight then  ;D  I have a pantry groaning with food, ditto fridge and freezer and an outhouse full of veggies and salad and it's all got to be eaten.  Mind you there won't be much left after Christmas Day and Boxing Day as having the family round.  Mind you have to keep trying to resist  until the big day.  Have already made serious in-roads into the wine though  ;D Hic  :P
Isn't that what digging is for .. ? ;D
Derekthefox :D
Emma Jane you have hit a raw nerve there, that poem, which was brilliant, is so true. But January hasn't arrived yet so I am going to enjoy Christmas. ;D busy_lizzie
E.J. ;) as Normal Excellent 8)