Allotments 4 All
General => The Shed => Topic started by: davyw1 on April 18, 2010, 17:00:15
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I have just finished puting my spuds in a patch that has not been used for a few year when a thought came to mind that i must not eat tomatoes till they are out.
No laughing please,
I got a tomato seed under my dentures and for them that like me know its like having half a building brick in there. So i tried to pick it out but it had gone into a small resess and i could not get at it so i decided to flush it out with the hose..........Now this is where it all went wrong, i turned the hose on to wash it out but did not know it was on blast and my teeth were in the palm of my hand and shot off about 20ft into the middle of the potato bed which was at its peak, (not laughing are you).
so of i went to fnd my teeth crawling along the rows and every now and then popping up to make sure no one was watching and being careful not to kneel on them. I found them and looked up to see if anyone was there, the coast was clear so up i come out of the tattie bed with teeth in hand. turnrd and there was the two biggest pains of my life standing there ( aged 78 and 74 ) laughing their heads off.
In unison they said " you tight barsteward buy a garden spade)
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ROFLOLOL .... ahem ..... er, no, I'm not laughing at all. Honest. ;D ;D (sounds like the sort of thing CornyK does on a regular basis) Well at least your potato patch is over its teething problems anyway <boom boom>
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sorry, davy ;D ;D ;D
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Sorry Davy but you've got to laugh, cheeky mare Sammy I've got all my own teeth, well all but one. Now your spuds are in Davey whats next to get your teeth into. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D sorry, not laughing :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
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HAHAHAHA ;D
brill story! typical that you got caught by them!
thanks for sharing!
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(http://i255.photobucket.com/albums/hh131/jazzbyrd/ROTFL110x85.gif)
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LOL!!!
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Brilliant, Really did laugh out loud ;D ;D ;D ;D
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No, I didn't laugh.. ::) ::) XX Jeannine
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I laughed.
I laughed too the time when I was sat on the back seat of the bus. I had to, the rest was pretty full. On the other side of that long seat was a bloke 50+ who had one of those sudden sneezes (we all get from time to time) and his dentures went flying out of his mouth and hit the back of the head of the woman in front of him, then landed on the floor.
'Thowwy' he said to her, dying of embarrassment whilst he picked up the set and replaced them in his mouth.
Yuk, was my thought about the state of the floor of the bus.
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;D ;D ;D at Davy.
I only have one tooth on a plate. Sorry, I will rephrase that, I used to have one tooth on a plate.
I have lost or broken so many of them over the past twenty years that I have now given up with a denture and just have a gap where my eye tooth used to be.
The first was accidentally thrown out with toffee papers at Services on the M4. ::)
Another one I left on the coffee table and the dog got it and crunched it into an unrecognisable state. >:(
I lost and found one in the washing machine. :D
One or two have just gone missing. :-\
One was run over by my car. It fell out of my bag when I was putting my grandson into his car seat. We drove off and I parked in more or less the same place when we returned and there it was crushed to smithereens in the road. :'(
Now you would have thought I'd learnt my lesson after running one over, but we were in a queue coming out of Tesco and on our way to B&Q. My tooth was on my lap. I thought about putting it away in my handbag but then thought I would put it in again when we got to B&Q. The queue hardly moved so I suggested to OH that he got out and walked to B&Q whilst I took over the driving. You guessed it.......the tooth fell onto the ground unnoticed when I got out of the car to walk to the drivers seat. Five minutes later and after driving about three metres, I remembered the tooth, got out of the car, walked back a bit and there it was, run over again! ::)
Why, you are asking, don't I keep the thing in my mouth? Well, I changed my dentist twenty years ago as my previous one retired. He is an excellent dentist but the plates that he has made me over the years have never really been that comfortable. Consequently, I only put the denture in when going out or receiving visitors. Each denture I have had replaced has cost me between £50 and £75, so it is not a cheap fix.
Is anyone else going to own up to what they have done with their dentures? ;D ;D
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I laughted, sorry hun :D, but....Nooo!!...you reminded me of what I was trying to avoid....dentist tomorrow and theyre going to pull my tooth, (second to last tooth at the bottom back), with a filling and the back end of it has shattered...£80 to pull it or £480 for root canal work... :-\
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Those were so funny! :D :D :D :D
(Guess I'll start flossing again.)
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here is another but NOT my teeth
We were out in a boat sea fishing and one of the lads sneezed as he was reeling a fish in and his teeth shot out of his mouth Yes you got it straight into the sea the rest of the lads were curled up in laughter.
Shortly after when things had calmed down Roy got a good size cod so for a laugh he took his teeth out and put them in the cods mouth and shouted " here look at this this cods got someones teeth in its mouth", the lad who,s teeth had went over the side ran straight over and grabbed them out of the fishes mouth and put them straight into his mouth, took them back out and said " agh s**t there not mine mine" and threw them over the side.
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I am not surprised that it costs £480 for root canal work. My grand daughter had to have it done and being a kid, I got the pleasure of sitting there whilst the dentist did it.
I had no idea how intricate it was to do, nor how long it would take. No pain for the child after the abcess was nipped with a week of anitbiotics but to clean the infection in the canals (and her roots were straight If they had been crooked and the dentist said that some are, the task would be near impossible). I lost count of the number of tiny little pin things he used to wipe out every bit of nasty stuff. It took ages. To be honest, I do not think that it is possible to give it a 100% guarantee either. There only needs a microscopic bit to be left for the infection to start up again.
A very interesting experience to watch, even though I had no idea until then what 'root canal work meant'.
I guess they do not do a lot of it on the NHS.
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;D ;D ;D at Davy.
I only have one tooth on a plate. Sorry, I will rephrase that, I used to have one tooth on a plate.
I have lost or broken so many of them over the past twenty years that I have now given up with a denture and just have a gap where my eye tooth used to be.
The first was accidentally thrown out with toffee papers at Services on the M4. ::)
Another one I left on the coffee table and the dog got it and crunched it into an unrecognisable state. >:(
I lost and found one in the washing machine. :D
One or two have just gone missing. :-\
One was run over by my car. It fell out of my bag when I was putting my grandson into his car seat. We drove off and I parked in more or less the same place when we returned and there it was crushed to smithereens in the road. :'(
Now you would have thought I'd learnt my lesson after running one over, but we were in a queue coming out of Tesco and on our way to B&Q. My tooth was on my lap. I thought about putting it away in my handbag but then thought I would put it in again when we got to B&Q. The queue hardly moved so I suggested to OH that he got out and walked to B&Q whilst I took over the driving. You guessed it.......the tooth fell onto the ground unnoticed when I got out of the car to walk to the drivers seat. Five minutes later and after driving about three metres, I remembered the tooth, got out of the car, walked back a bit and there it was, run over again! ::)
Why, you are asking, don't I keep the thing in my mouth? Well, I changed my dentist twenty years ago as my previous one retired. He is an excellent dentist but the plates that he has made me over the years have never really been that comfortable. Consequently, I only put the denture in when going out or receiving visitors. Each denture I have had replaced has cost me between £50 and £75, so it is not a cheap fix.
Is anyone else going to own up to what they have done with their dentures? ;D ;D
It might be cheaper in the long run to have a bridge made! I couldn't stand my one tooth on a palate so my dentist fixed a bridge and it's been fine- lasted about 25 years before it need replacing!
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If it makes you feel any better, a friend was at a swimming gala in the spectators gallery cheering her son on in his race when her denture fell out and into the backcombed coiffure of the woman below. My friend just didn't have the courage to ask for it back and we have spent a good few hillarious moments wondering what happened when the woman discovered it. ;D
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It might be cheaper in the long run to have a bridge made! I couldn't stand my one tooth on a palate so my dentist fixed a bridge and it's been fine- lasted about 25 years before it need replacing!
Thank you Gwynnethmary. I didn't know about bridges in dentistry so will ask my dentist at my check up in July.
It will be worth doing rather than keep losing my plate. ;D ;D
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Before I had my tooth fitted £1800 :o, I had a tooth in a plate and bloody hated it.
Any way I was at a Chas n Dave gig with my missus and about 8 other couples and after the sang some numbers they had a chat and asked if anyone had any questions, of course there was I with my hand in the air like a kid at school.
Yes said Chas, the good looking fella at the back. ;)
I asked a question about a pub they used to play in at Enfield, they said it was closing, but maybe locals could get together and raise some money to keep it open, blimey I shouted, (as I was at the back), surely with your money you could buy it youselves and with the last word the tooth flew into the row in front.
It was now the interval and I waited until they had all gone and went on my hands and knees looking for it.
When down in the bar my mates asked where I'd been, when I told them they laughed and said that'll teach you for keep asking questions.
My OH wondered why I'd not asked my mates to look, instead of waiting for them all to pass, because it would have been kicked from pillow to post thats why I said. ;D ;D ;D
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We had such fun reading your denture stories I passed them on to some ranchers who love reading funny stuff. They passed along a few of their own (though not quite the caliber of yours!):
"Working at a dental office I can tell a million of these...
Lady came into the office to get her denture relined. She told me that they were her mother's and when she died just before they closed the casket she had the mortician take her mom's teeth so she (the lady) could use them."
.................................
"My Dad and I had just left the yard headed for the pasture. Dad had grabbed us each an apple before we left. Right behind the house is the first gate to open which has an electric wire running through it. Well Dad just bit into his apple to hold it while he opened the gate but got a mean shock off a big Speedrite fencer and spit his apple out teeth and all. "
........
"Before I got into ranching I worked for the county hwy dept, It was around the first of the year and a guy I worked with went to some friends home out of town for a party, well he had to much to drink and needed to stop on way home to get rid of some of it ?? Next morning he asked his wife where his teeth were ??? You guessed it, they found them frozen on to side of road, he even told us all about it"
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Another story from one of the ranchers:
"The year I was a junior in high school, we had a thirty mile bus ride from Merriman to Gordon (in Nebraska.) The bus driver had owned a truck for many years and hauled cattle as his occupation. He had sold the cattle truck, and thought he'd kick back and do something easier, like haul kids instead of cattle. Boy, was he in for a rude awakening.
Ol' Louie just didn't get along with kids very well. The more the youngsters would act up, the more he'd chew them out and holler back from his driver's seat. One day, he was reading the riot act when all of a sudden the silence was deafening. Everyone looked up to see why he had quit talking. There on the dirty aisle floor lay his false teeth. Louie kept on driving, but reached down to rescue his choppers. He got out his handerchief, wiped them off pretty good, and popped them back in his mouth."