Allotments 4 All
General => The Shed => Topic started by: undercarriage plan on July 18, 2005, 18:25:23
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Just gets worse!! Whenever I start work for this particular couple, me and my 93 yr old client go for a walk around the garden, him pointing out for me jobs that he wants doing. We came to the yew hedge he wanted trimming , "oh" I exclaimed " I love yew"........... Didn't know where to look, took worst, possible option of carrying on talking, " I'm sorry, I don't love you, I like you........think you're a very nice man...." And so I continued, gibbering on!!! Just wish he'd have cracked one smile!!! Still got a job, but think he'll be keeping his distance..... Lol Lottie ;D
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Thats why one says Taxus baccata!
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Ha ha ha ha , would love to have seen that!
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I know, I know....!! Had terrible thought that he might not have even heard first comment, which would make rest of sentences even more bizarre........Not looking forward to walk next week. ::) Lottie ;D
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Lottie - you do make me larf! Have you thought about stand up? ;D I'd pay to see you - especially if you did the sketch about the bees and the lavendar bush!!! ;D ;D ;D
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Deeply insulted!! ;) This not stand up!!! This is my life!!! LOL! If I did stand up, I'd end up going to wrong theatre, falling off stage or being struck dumb! Never happened before, but always first time......... Lottie ;D
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UP You have my sympathy. I have the curse of putting my foot in it too ;D My Indian lotty neighbours have just come back from their hols in Florida. I said to the wife "ooooh, you do look brown" ;D
My husband hid in the shed to hide his tears of laughter
I once scraped my car down the length of my neighbour's Winnebago. I knocked on the door to deliver the bad news, told him I'd scraped the length of his new white motor home but was sure the black mark "would come off with a bit of Jif" ;D ;D
I'll get me coat ....
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Ha ha ha!! Nope, I'm definitely not on my own!!! Nice one Wardy!! Lottie ;D
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lottie are you sure your name is not plottie as i think u have lost the plot girl , but u do make me laugh u are a very funny lady , we could all do with a bit of what u are on ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
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Awwww, thanks Dibber! Just realized what xxxs for....!! Still a bit slow, only taken me 4 months to get it....If I was a stand up, would be a very slow show!! Lottie ;D
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what do u think the xxxs are for lottie i thought they were kisses :-* :-* :-*
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Dibber, I really have to say didn't know!! My brain seems to see things but not register their meaning, just saw lots of xs. Hit button too many times?? ??? For years wondered what shoo fly was, then talking toa mum on way back from school run, and said that saying was like someone going "Shoo, fly"!! Penny dropped 20 years after hearing it, thought something to do with shoes?? ::) ::) ::) Lottie ;D
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;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D lottie u have got it bad
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If only you knew the half of it!!!!! My Dad looks at me sideways with a look of bemusement on his face... Lottie ;D
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yeh but lottie u sound full of life and fun so who cares u make us laugh
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;D I have fun, have to say! But have nice life, very lucky!! Get to be outsde all day, and dig and prune and cringe with embarassment!!! Lovely !! Lottie ;D ;D ;D
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Makes me almost cry with laughter sometimes
wonder what visitors from outer space would make of this posting ha ha ha
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Think could lead to a fast left turn past Mars and out of here!!! Lottie ;D
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i think they would stay around lottie just to observe your posts lottie, and maybe yours to derek
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;D Tee hee ;D only just seen this ;D I love yew too! Lottie ;D Bet you made an old man very happy lol ;D
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Not sure, Roy.....There again today. very worrying, yew tree gone..... Ha!!! Not really!! He sweetie! He did ask me to remove tree though, 50ft spruce!!! I'stood there with segateurs in hand, peering up???? Declined pleasure.... Lottie ;D
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one women 50ft spruce ;D pairs of secateurs ::) 90 year old man :-*he doesn't want much then perhaps he thinks your super women
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Ha ha ha stop it please, my face is sore with laughing
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I think he looks at me and thinks "for goodness sake, woman, get on with it!!!" I just stood there, muttering, til he decided, after lengthy persuasion on my part, that perhaps a reputable tree surgeon could be the way forward!!! I'll give anything ago, but honestly....! Lottie ;D
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I could see you carrying that home on your bike lottie ha ha ha ;D
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me to derek i can see lottie trying to prop it up in her little wicker basket on the front of her bike , with secateurs resting behind lotties ear and a 90 year old bloke having a backie, with lottie trying to ride her bike with a dead leg what a thought ;D ;D ;D oh and lottie screaming i love YEW
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Very funny.....!! Still saving for the basket, quite liked the idea of a big JCB myself :o...... Lottie ;D
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JCB would certainly do the job lottie and a wicker basket would look good on the front
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LOL! JCB with basket....Must have one!!! OK new plan, ditching Cup obessession, shiney JCB!! I can polish it, get loads of Tesco shopping in it, pick up kids from school - all of them, and go for romantic drives in country...... What more could a girl wish for..!! ;D Lottie
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And never worry about parking probs either ! :D
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You're not insulting my driving are you!!!!!! Just cos I get my left and right muddled occasionally...... Lottie ;D
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i would defiantly go for the JCB the romantic drives in the country had me ROFL so funny
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Wonder if they do them in pink.......? Lottie ;D
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One of my most embarassing moments!!!!! My eldest daughter sucked her thumb for years. I was talking to MIL's neighbour and when I tried to say "She sucks her thumb" I put the th where the s should be and the s where the th shouild be!! Glad she had a sense of humour!!! Lorna.
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Honestly, Lorna, really... I', always so careful about thinking before opening my mouth...... ;) ;D Dibber, where's your lovely pic? Lottie ???
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what lovely pic lottie ?
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OK it back!! Pretty flower with xxxs was missing!! I creature of habit, get panic attacks if something changes!! Lottie ;D
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calm down lottie the xxxs are there , i have a nice brown paper bag for u to breathe into now be calm relax you will be fine ;D ;D ;D
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Pheww!! Thanks for that!! How did you get that pic there? No idea how peeps do that, would love one of something!! Crash helmet maybe? Perhaps better be dictionary!!;D Lottie
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OHhhhhhhhhhhhh stop it!!! I just found this thread and have nearly cracked a rib laughing. Wifey thinks I've gone mad :D :D
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Dibber very good with paper bag......! Feel better all ready, may lend it but that would involve change.... Oh no!!! Give it back! Lottie ;D
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calm down lottie u can have bag back i have plenty ,glad u like my picture my 16 year old son made it for me i dont have a clue ,icyberjunkie cant believe u have read this tread just thought it was only 3 mad peeps that wrote and read this welcome to the mad house
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And what a wonderful place it is!! Lottie ;D
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I am just waiting for my life membership . . .
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Automatic for you, Derek......! ;) Lottie
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and me i hope lottie
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Goes without saying, Dibber.......!! Lottie ;D
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thanks lottie so can i be in your and dereks gang or do i have to prove myself
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Ooooooo, a dare I think!! Don't you Derek?!! We had to do dares....... I've since mastered the art of snorfel lafig (?) but it was a tough one!!!!! Lottie ;D
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sounds weird , dont set me to hard a task or dare nice and easy for the first one go easy on me please
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I am more than happy for you to be in the gang, cos I am a pushover you see ! :D
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pushover Derek thank goodness for that i don't have to do any dares , thanks for letting me be in your gang Derek and lottie
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Exscuse me!!! I don't remember anyone saying no dares needed!! ::) I would like photographic evidence of an origami JCB please, by, shall we say by 7pm?? ;D ;) Lottie
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OK lottie will do you will definitely have it by 7 pm tomorrow evening
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LOL!! Can't wait, intrigued!! Which post will you be doing....!! Lottie ;D
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have posted digger on blue grass thread happy judging
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Derek has 40 mins left for jcb post.... getting tense now....Lottie ;D
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Got my post up, but Dibber has definitely won ! ! !
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thanks derek but yours is also good i hope you made it yourself i dont like cheats
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Now, now children.... be nice!! I'm sue Derek made it himself, didn't you Derek??? We don't want a stewards enquiry now do we...!!! Lottie ;D
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Remember my efforts were purely to make sure dibber got into the gang . . .
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i know your intentions where very kind with me in mind for getting me in gang so thanks
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You 2 honestly!! Was supposed to be cut throat, kill or be killed, poke you in eye with radish competition!!! Not "you go first" " No you"!! Really..........!! But I have to say, what a laugh!!!!!!!! Of course, while all this was going on, I've knocked up an origami sprout...... Lottie ;D
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picture please lottie we like to share our origami pictures
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OK! Origami sprout coming up!! Will post pic tomorrow!! Need glue, paper, paint, scissors, vodka, lemon, jcb, electrician (?????) OK, ready, be back soon........ Lottie
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cant wait to see this i think derek should do dare as well ;) ;)me thinks he should do origami guitar 8) 8) 8)
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Good plan, origami guitar with each indivdual string, and in tune!!!!!!!!!!!!! Lottie ;D
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Perhaps this is a good time to make a fast exit into another post ! :D
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Get your ***** back here and start folding!!!! Lottie >:( ;)
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What makes you think I can fold anything other than a poker hand (cant do that either ! ) :D
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derek no getting out of it we want a origami guitar come on, but lotties not done her sprout yet so u get a move on to lottie ::) ::) ::)
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OK, on the case, now taking children gambling (?) then will have group origami session....then therapy... Lottie ;D
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think u might need the therapy first :o :o :o could u tell the kids to do tenner each way for me on mad lottie running in the 315 at Bath races
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Ok, I will admit ... I may be a pushover, and even a big softie for films like Meet Joe Black, but I am not a black belt in origami . . .
Therefore I am offering an alternative, a guitar brooch in wood wot I carved . . .
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v285/Derekthefox/brooch.jpg)
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very good derek i think if you made it yourself you can be let off with the origami, its very good all hand carved weldone ;D ;D ;D, just leaves lottie to get her sprout on here
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OK been in stitches most of the afternnoon, children so into this, all now trying to make origami sprouts in kitchen......!!! Anyway!! Here it is, it may look like a piece of green scrunched up paper, but each fold is meticulously thought out..... Lottie ;D
(http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y197/undercarriage/sprout.jpg)
PS had such a funny afternoon, wouldn't know where to start!!!
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that is so funny funniest sprout i have ever seen but very good , :o :o :o cant stop laughing at thought of you and kids making sprouts,
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Still being made!!! I have loads of them now!!! Some pink, one glitery, one flat (?).......!! Will take pics, but camara charging at min!! What a day!!! Gambling went well, start 'em early I say, Had to drag Maggie off floor looking for 2ps!! Then Felixstowe beach, in gale force 10, then driving lesson by 5 yr old....... Where's me rhubarb.....!! Lottie ;D
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Well I think that is the best origami sprout I have ever seen, so take a bow . . .
Then again, perhaps I have reason to be biased . . . :D
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lottie sounds like you have had a very fullfilling day
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Even for me, has been a strange one!!! Realized kids thought I needed encouraging for something, no idea what, felt like they were taking out maiden Aunt!!!! God sprouts though eh? Lottie ;D
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The question has to be asked though - what are you going to do with all those sprouts. I figured you could always keep the safe then go and glue them onto someones sprout plants just before Xmas ;D
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I would suggest Icy, as you mentioned Christmas, that they become a rather attractive decoration on the tree . . .
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Oooo!! You wait til I post pics!! These very "special" sprouts.....Taken very seriously by under 12s, Icey and Derek..... need i say more! Lottie ;D
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cant wait to see these speacil sprouts, never know lottie u could sale them om ebay
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OK, have taken pic of remaining 3, be too popular for ebay could start run on origami sprouts??? Lottie ;D
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perhaps we could decorate Derek's new pantie shop with them ::) ::) ::)the sprouts that is
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I know I posted them somewhere, really!!! Three gorgeous sprouts. Never heard of a lingerie and origami sprout shop..... :o Gap in Market? Lottie ;D
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told you lottie you are going to be rich ;D ;D ;D with them origami sprouts
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Just so much talent, and so little time ;D ;D ;D Lottie
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will have to send you on a weekend origami sprout Holiday
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If you send me on origami sprout holiday, you're coming with me!!!! Kicking and screaming...... And I'll bring the JCB ;D ;D ;D Lottie
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sounds like fun :D :D when do we go and can i bring my origami JCB
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Girlie weekend away......Sounds like a giggle!!!! And yes, of course you can bring your origame JCB, as long as there are no earwigs in it.. actually had case packed for 2 week hols, suppose better go and unpack :'( :o Lottie ;D
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wonder how many peeps will be there bet there are hundreds of origami sprout lovers
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Oooo and A4A origami sprout jamberee!! What a great idea!!I agree Dibber, bet loads out there...... :-\ Lottie ;D
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i bet there are millons and millons ;D ;D ;D ;D
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They obviously not ready to come out yet, they'll soon realize, sprout making a fine, old traditional art, greatly respected in Suffolk..... ;D ;D ;D Lottie
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they will soon come out the closet when they see what wonderful sprout maker you are
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Awwww, thanks Dibber, one of my lesser known talents.. :-X Lottie ;D
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you are weldone queen sprout maker :o :o
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Gosh, you say the nicest things, Just think of how many things I'll have made by the time you get back...from hols....leaving me.......Sob :'( Don't worry, I'm fine really...off you go......( No wailing face here so stumped!!) Lottie