Sorry to hear you are suffering, and run out of jokes Gazza.
I do like the thought of planting a pair of pink plastic gloves, perhaps they will protect my rhubarb someone might think it some a nasty disease.
Malling Centenary are a fabulous taste, but just found they are suspectible to disease which is a bind. Some people are very careless about bringing in various plants with diseases. Their fruits are very attractive, took like the perfect strawberry, reputed to produce nearly 90% top quality fruit.