Topic: Why Do We Bother?

[Ninnyscrops.]

The reason my plot and garden as looking so sad is because my son was diagnosed with a terminal illness and I have lost the joy of growing for now. I am holding on to the plot and hoping for sunnier skies. I am not foolish enough to think that there aren't some broken hearts out there amongst you all but if all is well count your blessings. Things can always improve with the weather.

I'm so sorry worldor, I didn't read your post before I did mine. Our son grits his teeth and we growl back, it's time we stopped that and as you say, count our blessings. There will be sunnier skies and I hope your son and you enjoy them whilst you can.

Ninny x

[worldor]

Thank you all.

[mormor]

Hold on. My daughter died of leukemia five years ago- And the plot helped. You can get rid of anger digging. Cry in peace. Tear out weeds - you can imagine tearing out your frustration. Just keep going. It does actually help - although not much where you are now. I feel for you. I’ve been there.

[worldor]

Yes. When I was in my angry stage I did go down and plant some seed potatoes. It was the strangest thing. I went down to the plot alone and bashed the holes out and chucked the potatoes in crying all the time. It seems that it is like grieving and you go through the same stages. I have accepted things now I think and feel deadened inside. No tears, no joy, no anger. Not sure how I feel to be honest. Sorry about your daughter. Life can be so cruel can't it.

[Jeannine]

Worldor, one of my best friends sons is goig through the same as you, he is in his 3rd year, we are pretty close so I know to some extent how you are coping, my friend had tremendous peaks and lows in the beginning but then she seemed to get very numb. She tells me she wakes up some mornings with that|"something is going to happen feeling" and is off kilter all day.

It is a dreadful thing to have to go through, I wish you strength and shall be thinking of you.

XX Jeannine

[worldor]

Thank you Jeannine. Pass on my sympathy to your friend.

[carosanto]

Worldor, please don't stop 'bothering'.  Your son needs your support now, but your plot will give you support too in so many ways.  When you are ready come back to the world of growing.  And there is always support in lots of ways from this forum.  The sun WILL shine for you again, I promise....as I hope it will shine for the rest of us real soon.

Caro

[gardenqueen]

Well I was going to complain about the bad luck I have had
 in the garden. 3 lots of runner beans grown in the green house, all of which rotted. Dwarf french beans planted outside, most of which eaten by slugs, a large border of sweetcorn which I doubt will ever produce a crop! Confined to home for the past 4 weeks due to a leg infection and wishing I could get out in the greenhouse let alone the garden. .

Then I read your post Worldor and realise that life is too short to worry about a few crops that have failed!

I am thinking of you at this worrying time for you and your family. I hope that you can find solace in your allotment.

[worldor]

Thank you all for your supportive replies. Carry on enjoying your growing. Hope the sun shines for you all soon.

[Two Choices]

Sorry to hear your bad news and my thoughts are with you.  I'm going through something similar but with my Dad. Been feeling really down in the dumps but managed to force my self to the lottie today and actually got away from it all for an hour. It's amazing what a bit of sunshine can do on an otherwise gloomy day.