Topic: Feeling Unloved

[irnhed]

Hi guys - I'm looking for some sympathetic ears at the moment, and I'm hoping this is the best place.

Please bear with me as I whinge.

So, I took on my second allotment around Oct last year.  My intention from day 1 has always been to concentrate on growing fruit there - as I already have a mature vegetable plot up and running.

Being very interested in wildlife gardening, having a small patch in the first allotment, and loads in the garden at home, I planned to make use of some space in the new plot towards helping bio-diversity.  Particularly around attracting pollinating insects (given my fruit, and the fact that I'm a bee-keeper) and encouraging natural pest control of our gastropod friends.

Long story short, the majority of the plot is given to fruit production, along with sunflowers & other crops for eating.

In addition, I've installed a pond to encourage amphibians, and have some flowering shrubs to encourage pollinating insects.  The pond is secured with a 1.5m fence all around it for safety.

Word has gotten back to me that there has been some grumbling about my not using *all* of the plot for fruit & veg.  Interestingly, a committee member has specifically told me that he's very happy with me having the pond - given the benefits in pest reduction, and a few other people have come up to me to ask about the plot, to wish me all of the best and to say they're exciting to see how the plot develops over time.

What really gets me is the short-sightedness of people.

What I'm doing should help everyone, helping to control pests, pollinating crops and increasing the bio-diversity of the site.

I'd be so, so, so happy if people came up to me to talk about what I'm doing, as some have done.  You can't stop me from going on once I get started.

I'm also happy if people who have reservations with my approach would speak with me so that we can discuss - but no one has.

I just feel so frustrated at the moment, and not exactly welcomed on site.

I'm hoping that it's just 'cos its early in the season, and I've not had much chance to bump in to people on-site.  Hopefully people will come over and we can chat about it.

(Deep breath out) - feel better for that.  I just don't see why people can't just be accepting of things - I'm not doing any harm at all.

Rob.

[caroline7758]

Your plot sounds lovely to me. Some people just enjoy grumbling, ignore them and just enjoy the people who have been friendly. Maybe you could invite some local schoolchildren to come and look at your wildlife area- bet they'd love it!

[angle shades]

 :) carry on doing what your doing!

I have a wasps nest and a bees nest on my plot, but won't tell the folk 2 plots down as they don't like anything that flies or flowers on there plot, how they think things get pollinated is beyond me.....some folk just don't like nature .. I on the other hand see it as a photo opportunity  ;D/ shades x

[Georgie]

I'm fully supportive of what you are doing and I can't see what others are grumbling about.  Good luck.  :)

G x

[Unwashed]

Life's too short to be overly bothered about what people say or think.

I have known nosey sites.  To be honest, apart for the odd individual, my current site keeps itself to itself, but my first site was very intrusive.  If you're a friendly sort it can be difficult to deal with because it's not your first inclination to tell someone to butt-out when you're trying to settle in.  If it was me I'd say hello but not encourage any more involvement than that, not until I'd found my feet.

And I have a pond with a nice woven fence round it, and I'm buggered if I could give a monkey's toss whether anyone else approves or not.  And it's none of my business what anyone else does on their plot if it's not having any negative impact on me.

[goodlife]

Ohh..been there..still I am..some folk think that because they cannot see bare soil and straight lines ..you are letting the site down ::)..if you are not doing anything against the rules and your way of growing doesn't cause any harm for others..(shade and all that,,)..let those who critize mind they own business.. ::)
I'm trying to be friendly and talk with anybody..but if somebody does give me grief..they will get answer back..luckily there is very few of those and most are friends with me and quite happily come and wonder about to see what I'm up to now ::),,it just take some time.. ;D..go and do your thing with chin up...

[irnhed]

Thanks guys.  I appreciate you taking time to read through and share your thoughts.

I feel much better about it all now.  I know that I'm not breaking any of the rules.

Cheers.

[Squash64]

I wouldn't worry about a few people moaning, it's impossible to please everyone.

A few years ago not many people on our site grew flowers and the few who did often got criticized, mainly by one old bloke.  Then, for some unknown reason, he decided to enter our 'Flower Garden' competition last year and came second.
Guess who is busy planting even more flowers this year!

[Robert_Brenchley]

It sounds as though there are at least some people who appreciate what you're doing. Don't take any notice of the grumblers, or you'll get worn down.

[shirlton]

Quite a few of us on our site in Erdington put some of our ground over to flowers and a couple of folks have ponds. We also have a wildlife area with another pond and recently we have added four bee hives in an enclosure. I think the problems start when people decide to use an entire plot for ponds and wildflowers  when folks are on the waiting list to grow food.

[Jeannine]

I usually find the folks who grumble about someone are jealous of them..take it as a compliment and from me well done to you,it sounds lovely.XX Jeannine

[antipodes]

Yes I had trouble fitting into our site too, as I am not one of the "bare soil and straight rows brigade" :)  They had trouble understanding strange methods like mulching, covering etc. My plot is a mish mash of small patches of this and that but my variety of crops is large. One person there still does not speak to me because he doesn't approve of me. Tough s**t is what I say. I pay my rent, I have every inch of my plot in usage (what I choose to grow is my business, in my opinion) and I use no chemicals, and instead use flowers etc to encourage insects. How can that be harmful to others?

You will find that many people just want to moan, and they cannot accept anyone doing things differently. Keep on with your ideas, and soon your persistence will bring them round. I slogged on my plot, by myself, for 3 years now, and I am pleased to say that I now can say hello to many people on the site, I get on well with my neighbour and I was particularly gratified the other day when two of the "old boys" watching me plant my tomatoes, looking at all the growth on my plot, said "Maybe she does have green fingers after all"...
It will improve with time. Persevere.

[lewic]

I suspect there might be some jealousy going on. You have put loads of time and effort into building a nice pond (not to mention it being your second plot!) and now other people want one. But they are too lazy or unskilled to build one themselves!

[star]

It also seems very unfair that your 'encouraged' wildlife will ultimately help in the moaners plots too. Pity they cant appreciate that fact. Miserable gits

It sounds lovely, don't let them worry you  :D

[mark_h]

You get Victor Meldrews on most sites but don't let them get to you, as you've already mentioned, they haven't had the balls to come and whinge to your face.   

Stuff em is what I say!  As long as you are happy with the plot that's the main thing.

Mark

[camo_lady]

oh that sounds SO familiar!

I took on my first plot 4 years ago. Couldn't see more than a 1/4 due to brambles 10ft high as the plot had been abandoned for 10 years due to the death of the last chap.

With encouragement from the very old chap across from me, I tackled it with nothing more than secateurs as he said there were old varieties of trees and shrubs somewhere under all that bramble.  We found he was right, BUT because we haven't taken a digger to the lot and scraped it to bare earth, folks are complaining.. And trying to cause trouble for us with the land-owner!

Ok, so it's more like 'forest gardening' than 'allotment', but we had liteally tons of plums, apples and other fruit.

Now some of the 'Meldrews' are complaining about us creating raised beds for our disabled gardeners using tyres.  But, I asked the land owner if he would object to the idea, and had no reply of objection; we've paid our rent.. So...

Carry on doing what you're doing!

[irnhed]

Thanks for all the replies guys.

I was on-site for a wee-while yesterday, and it just made me smile, seeing the pond plants showing their heads and the sunflowers steadily reaching upward.

You're right - I should just enjoy it and not get hung up on the opinions of others.

Hopefully I'll have to frogs to watch this time next year (I've already seen a couple in my garden.  One of them hopping away from my push-along mower).

Cheers,  Rob.

[Flighty]

I've got two very small ponds on the plot, as well as a logpile and two small areas left  for wildlife. I grow lots of flowers, especially sunflowers, as well as soft fruit and vegetables. It's certainly not what you'd call a conventional allotment but blow what anyone else thinks, and it's a darn sight tidier and productive than some of the others on the site!

[Borlotti]

I know the feeling, but my cats love me but OH doesn't if I smoke.