Topic: I need your support dealing with something very sad

[asbean]

I'm so sorry to hear of your friend's illness, you are going to have a really tough time ahead.  Emmy1978 suggested a memory box - several years after my OH died I was playing some music cassettes and came across one he had put in the machine, set it on record and left it.  It was a fun thing to do, I remember the day well, it was a wet bank holiday, one of my sons had been on a day trip to Bognor, and we were all chatting together.  But years later it was such an emotional experience hearing his voice and laughter again.  Photos and other mementos are great - but the sound of a loved one's voice is something else altogether.

[grawrc]

yep Asbean I have a cassette like that where my Dad ( who died in 1992) is chatting to my son (born 1978) when he was about 3 or 4.

I haven't yet dared to watch Peter and my wedding video. That will be something else I think. The man that filmed it (and his wife) are coming tomorrow with a bottle of wine, so who knows, we might watch it together.

[caroline7758]

So sorry to hear about your friend, Jeannine. Don't forget to look after yourself as well, though.

[busy_lizzie]

Jeannine, So sorry to hear the news about your friend.  It is so difficult to know what to say at times like this because it is so tough. It is a blessing your dear fiend has a friend like you who will support her during what will be a painful time. As others have said please look after yourself too. love busy_lizzie

[emmy1978]

I think she needs someone who is not afraid to let her talk. That I am confident I can do.

XX Jeannine

That's what I was for OH's mum. All she wanted to say about leaving him and his brothers and our girls, all her anger, the feeling of being cheated, it's all got to come out and I think I was just removed enough that she felt happy doing that with me. She wrote me a beautiful letter to be read when she was gone and it said how fantastic it was that she'd had someone who just let her talk. Love to you Jeannine. You know where we are when it's your turn to offload.  :-* :-* :-*

[Tora]

I'm so sorry to hear this Jeannine. :(
I don't know what to say really... I feel so useless.
Your friend, her kids and you are in my heart, Jeannnine.

[Jitterbug]

Hi Jeannine

I have been watching this post since it appeared and have not been able to formulate words that would be sufficient to comfort you that others have not said. We also have a young mother in our church with two little ones (under 5) fighting the same battle - she however is busy undergoing bone marrow transplant so we are praying that this works out.  So my heart really goes out to you. 

Jeannine never think that just holding her and mopping up the tears is inadequate - it is the biggest (and hardest) thing you are doing because at the same time you have to be strong for her and not show your own emotions.  It is that strength of character and support that will pull her (and you) through to the end.  She has some tough things to go through and do and with you by her side she will manage it with dignity.  When you need a shoulder to cry on you have all us A4A's just a posting away. 

I am a Christian so have had my faith and church to support me during trying times so please know that you and her will be constantly in my prayers.  Please could you pm me her name so that I can get our homecell to pray for her on a regular basis.

Jitterbug

[Jeannine]

Will do Jitters XX Jeannine