Author Topic: Latest visit from Jeannine.  (Read 13075 times)

tricia

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #20 on: March 18, 2016, 00:32:03 »
Lovely to hear from you Jeannine - sad to hear about John but glad for you that he is close by. Now that he is settled I hope you will soon feel better and will have time and more energy for growing things now that Spring is on its way.

A big hug and welcome back  :wave:

Tricia

Jeannine

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #21 on: March 18, 2016, 02:12:02 »
Thank you the hug and cheerful wave,I really miss you all so new resolution is to stay I  touch  Xx jeannine
When God blesses you with a multitude of seeds double  the blessing by sharing your  seeds with other folks.

Jayb

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #22 on: March 20, 2016, 11:01:21 »
Happy to see you back posting Jeannine.
But sorry to read your news about John, though very glad he is closeby and you are managing.
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Jeannine

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #23 on: March 20, 2016, 19:22:20 »
Hi Jay. and thank you. It is incredibly hard much much worse than I could have dreamed of. My best friend of 40 years lost her husband the very same day that John went into the hospital and she says that she thinks it is harder too. Watching someone gradually lose themselves bit by bit and knowing there is no chance of remission etc is almost impossible to deal with. The best way I know is to be alone and quiet but of course everyone thinks then depression has set it. It hasn't and thank goodness my Dr agrees. It is grief but usually a person can start to heal after a death whereas this just gets worse every day as John loses something else. I find every stage starts another bout of grief.

Having said all of the above I am trying to focus on other things.

I found a packet of TPS Ratte in among my seeds the other day that came from you, thy have probably had it but I have given them a chance. In fact everything I have sown is very old, it is along time since I bought seeds, but it is amazing just what has germinated. I also sowed seeds from the odd branch od Tommy Toe, plus seeds from me Tiny Toes and your Tiniest Toes. It was an afterthought and just a few days ago so don't know about those yet.

I also found some old Daubenton seeds from HSL so with fingers crossed they went in too. I think I am asking a lot but who knows. I let my membership lapse so have no idea what HSL have now and I am so out of touch generally.

Hope you are doing well and growing great stuff this year.

I miss our chats, infact I miss you all but didn't feel able to communicate or jin in for a long time , despite one or two tries, but I think I will be OK this time.

Bless you all,

XX Jeannine
When God blesses you with a multitude of seeds double  the blessing by sharing your  seeds with other folks.

cambourne7

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #24 on: March 20, 2016, 20:57:25 »
where hear for you always Jeanine xx

galina

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #25 on: March 20, 2016, 22:28:41 »
Thank you the hug and cheerful wave,I really miss you all so new resolution is to stay I  touch  Xx jeannine

Jeannine, yes please do stay in touch.  We may not fully understand what you are going through with the very long and painful goodbye to John, but we are here and very happy to listen.

Don't worry about the tps.  Apparently they can outlive most other seeds, ten, twenty and more years.  I found this out only recently.  They even germinate faster when they are older.  No rush there.

Tomatoes do ten years easily and up to 12 years here.  Peas up to 9 and squash up to 10 years.  Hope you are still fine for most of your seeds and can watch new seedlings popping up every day.   :wave:

Jeannine

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #26 on: March 21, 2016, 01:03:47 »
It is somehow very comforting in an odd sort of way to see seeds popping up which are old and theoretically past it. I seem to want to use them up as if I am responsible in a strange way. I have them in a heated propagator, I call it "my delivery room" then when they pop up they are moved to the "nursery" under the lights.

 Galina I sometimes think I am losing it  LOL .I have these great long conversations with what appear to be empty Jiffy Pellets, then I compliment them when  I move the little "greenies" on  after they appear, oh and I mustn't forget the long discussions I have with my Chihuahuas about what to sow !!!!

  I guess somewhere along the line I have managed to maintain a bit of my sense of humour. :laughing7:
When God blesses you with a multitude of seeds double  the blessing by sharing your  seeds with other folks.

Silverleaf

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #27 on: March 21, 2016, 02:01:12 »
Jeannine, my boyfriend's mum has Alzheimer's so I know a tiny bit what you're going through. It's heartbreaking to see such a lovely lady suffering such a horrible disease - as you say, it's like little bits of them get lost and you can never get that back. You just have to try to enjoy whatever time you have.

I know it's a million times harder when it's a partner. Make sure you're taking care of yourself too.

Jeannine

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #28 on: March 21, 2016, 02:33:02 »
Thank you Silverleaf.

It is hard, John and I have been married for 57 years at Easter, he is  a Mensan  with a very high IQ so it is especially difficult to watch the process. There are many milestones that one goes through. John himself was very realistic about his diagnosis, he knew what was coming and he left written instructions to guide me regarding choices. I didn't agree with them all but I do as he asks which in itself very difficult sometimes.

I too am realistic, it is a terminal illness, many folks don't realize that. He is dying I know that but  he is way past the point where he knows what is happening now which is a blessing. He is living in the moment. Often I meet folks who think it is just a memory thing but of course it is not, he is gradually losing functioning parts of his body. I think his swallowing will be next but I am prepared for that. Actually I am pretty much prepared for all that is to come on a logical level but there is always that part one oneself that just doesn't quite expect it will go the way it must.  I am better when the folks around me are just straight forward and don't try to do  what I call  " the  there there never mind thing". I understand folks want to make others feel better and don't know how. I too feel the same thing when other folks are faced with severe illness. People are embarrassed  and uncomfortable about the dying and feel they need magic words to make it all better. I actually had two people who said more or less the same thing  and that was "well at least it's not cancer." The thing is if it were cancer I could support him verbally and he would understand.

I appreciate your post, thank you and of course I am very sorry to hear about your loved one too. It is a shi...y disease that takes all people and we are long overdue some good heavy research into it.. I have been told  that many people  die before the illness takes them from other health problems but John  is unusual in that he has no other issues so I have also been told it may take longer for him.

Life is very odd but we try to count our blessings where we find them.

Thank you again

XX Jeannine
When God blesses you with a multitude of seeds double  the blessing by sharing your  seeds with other folks.

Deb P

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #29 on: March 21, 2016, 11:23:55 »
Thinking of you, sowing the new years seeds always seems like such a hopeful act doesn't it, whatever is happening in your life and the challenges you are facing take a brief respite. You need to have these little acts of hope to keep you going I think.

I was thinking of you as I sowed some "Jeannine's lettuce mix" and some of your "lucky dip" heritage tomato seeds the other day.  I have sown and saved those seeds ever since the infamous seed swap at Barnsdale, and have given loads to our lottie plant sales over the years, so who knows how far those original seeds have spread over the years, it's a heartwarming thought eh.
If it's not pouring with rain, I'm either in the garden or at the lottie! Probably still there in the rain as well TBH....🥴

http://www.littleoverlaneallotments.org.uk

galina

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #30 on: March 21, 2016, 11:47:07 »

 Galina I sometimes think I am losing it  LOL .I have these great long conversations with what appear to be empty Jiffy Pellets, then I compliment them when  I move the little "greenies" on  after they appear, oh and I mustn't forget the long discussions I have with my Chihuahuas about what to sow !!!!

  I guess somewhere along the line I have managed to maintain a bit of my sense of humour. :laughing7:

Talking to plants is a very normal and sane thing to do - have to think whether this includes empty jiffy pellets?  But the seeds inside do need all the encouragement they get to germinate - which surely means it's all good!  :sunny:

Jeannine

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #31 on: April 03, 2016, 22:03:56 »
Just a wee update I wanted to share.

 When John was in the hospital waiting for a care home placement they had him sedated as they has him on a regular ward. I wasn't happy  and was never very sure whether what I saw was the sedation or the progression of his disease. Since moving to the facility they promised me that they would get him down to the lowest dose as  soon as they could. They are doing that and John is more alert. He is less like a zombie, he is chuckling  and there is a little bit of him coming back. He has asked for the toilet several times, ( the hospital put him in paper underwear and said he was incontinent) so he is being toileted again. A few days ago he got a private room so he can have a lot of his won things, chairs , DVD, stereo etc, and he now appreciating the sound of much of his favorite music.

It is just a small thing but at least I know just where he is with his Alzheimers and not just vegetative due to drugs. It means we can enjoy the occasional moment together and these are very precious to me.  I took him in some plants and he is  still  almost with me enough to recognize them as mini rose, daffodils and an orchid.

Good things come in small packets,, thank  God for the small packets.

XX Jeannine
When God blesses you with a multitude of seeds double  the blessing by sharing your  seeds with other folks.

Jeannine

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #32 on: May 10, 2016, 18:29:08 »
We have had a good week, I have brought John home two afternoons this last week, he enjoyed the garden, did a bit of watering and practically ate me out of house and home. I toileted him with no problems which goes to show he is not incontinent, they have him in paper underwear for their convenience. I was quite surprised when he greeted my daughters dog in his old way and with her name too.

Yep, it has been a good few days
When God blesses you with a multitude of seeds double  the blessing by sharing your  seeds with other folks.

galina

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #33 on: May 11, 2016, 08:14:33 »
Jeannine, so pleased to hear that John had a couple of really good days and could enjoy himself.  The bond between humans and animals must be very strong and formed in another way.  Maybe John will be able to enjoy the dogs for a while longer yet.  It will make the next step backwards all the harder to bear for you, but this week is a good week.  Your kindness is organising such events for John which he can still enjoy at his level of illness  :sunny: 

antipodes

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #34 on: May 16, 2016, 15:41:31 »
Jeannine, I am sending you lots of positive thoughts. You  are right, most people think Alzheimer's disease is just getting doddery. My mum died from it, or a related illness, no one was really sure, and my dad was not at all prepared for the ranting, the wandering off, the absolutely bizarre behaviour, and of course forgetting everyone you love. Then the processes get lost, you can't dress or feed yourself, and then it goes downhill to a vegetative state. It is in my mind one of the worst diseases and I think we are not doing nearly enough to cope with it and find a treatment.
I really feel for you, and hope that you are doing OK,
Adrienne
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Jeannine

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #35 on: May 16, 2016, 20:17:18 »
If a person doesn't die from an unrelated cause and the Az goes it;s full length, then the brain gradually turns off all it's functions, swallowing , sight, speech, are the noticeable ones but of course the brain also controls everything else too Most folks don't go that far though, often a chill can quickly turn into pneumonia . One of the odd things is that he is bruising very easily and his skin tears with any pressure. His forearms were almost black last week, now I know it is with lifting him up but I went to see the care director who has insisted the staff do not lift him that way so I am hoping that will stop now. He actually can get himself out of a chair but I guess they are in a hurry. Not good enough, but they know I will be back  in if there is a problem
When God blesses you with a multitude of seeds double  the blessing by sharing your  seeds with other folks.

Pescador

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Re: Latest visit from Jeannine.
« Reply #36 on: May 18, 2016, 19:14:32 »
Hi Jeannine,
Good that you and John had some good time together earlier in the month. Cherish the memories.
Luv and best wishes to you.
Paul.
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