Author Topic: Rant and Need advice  (Read 4852 times)

Digeroo

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Rant and Need advice
« on: July 30, 2015, 09:15:14 »
The guy on the next plot to me has complained officially that I have trodden on his onions. But I have not done anything to his onions, even the ones hanging over the edge of my plot.

Onions fall over when they begin to dry. It is what onions do, they were made that way. 

Some of the guys on site line theirs up in neat interlocking rows to dry. 

galina

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #1 on: July 30, 2015, 10:20:32 »
Could this be one of those complaints that has nothing whatsoever to do with onions?  Can't be proved one way or another in any case as it is his word against yours. And just why would you do that in any case?

Very annoying, but tells you more about him as a person than about your alleged 'crime' and I hope that whoever the official complaint was directed to, can see this as well. 

Why not get proactive and show the secretary/committee member the path between your plots and his overhanging onion tops?  This way the 'counter complaint' is in place together with his complaint.  On the other hand it is probably more productive for future dealings to just reassure him that it wasn't you (and why would you want to harm his veg, he doesn't harm yours?) and try to keep an even keel in the relations without the help of others, if that is possible.

These are not prize winning onions by any chance and your neighbour is getting just a bit paranoid whether he will or will not make a competition win? 

Ellen K

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #2 on: July 30, 2015, 11:05:59 »
^^ Wot G said.

But if it were me, I would just wait to see what happens next.

I'm guessing here that he hasn't got a shred of evidence.  And is this the guy who dug a trench along the boundary so soil from your plot was falling in to it?  And built a massive compost bin that shaded and spilled over to your garden.

Good fences make good neighbours I say.

Digeroo

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #3 on: July 30, 2015, 13:55:40 »
Not the compost guy.  Getting on ok there now. 

But yes the trench guy.  And he walks across my plot and treads on things.   He chopped down my poppies.  He dropped potatoes and when I objected said I should be grateful for the potatoes.    Do I want his sprouted supermarket potatoes?

The only good thing is that because he believes that I trod on his onions he has stopped walking across my plants.  Great,  But I think he is going round rubbishing me.  I am getting some odd looks.










Bill Door

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #4 on: July 30, 2015, 14:27:26 »
I am with Ellen.

Don't react and don't say anything unless approached officially.  Then stay silent until they give you any evidence that they have.  Even if they ask you directly don't say yes or no, just ask who provided the evidence that you did it.

I shouldn't worry about the odd looks,  they can only be odd for a short time.

Good luck with the veges

regards

Bill

Tee Gee

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #5 on: July 30, 2015, 15:20:37 »
Join the club!

I am seriously thinking of leaving my plot as I feel as I have been sent to Coventry.

As a matter of fact it is now a week since I was last down simply because  I just don't have the interest to go down there  anymore.

Not even the thought of my three greenhouses full of stock and dying of thirst can tempt me down.


There is a new group/clique formed on the site who in my day would be called 'yuppies' and they are making a take over.

They break planning laws, fly tip, taking advantage of people particularly the older people  and they have now elected one of themselves as Site Secretary.


This is my fifth secretary since I took my plot on in 1989 and each succeeding one has got worse in terms of attitude towards the plot holders       they all become power mad!

But in actual fact they have no powers whatsoever they are basically a liaison between the plot holders and the council ( the owners)


Yet when they first came on the site as individuals they always came to me for advice which I gave freely and often some plants into the bargain.

Now they think they know it all and think they are in no need of my services any longer, hence me being sent to Coventry.

Trouble is I have forgotten more than they have ever learned.

I sometimes think that  if I remain a plot holder, my day will come in so far as;  if they ever come to me for  advice or assistance,e.g.  like watering their greenhouses when they go on holiday......Sorry folks......It won't be forthcoming!.

It has got to the stage where I  have never been on the plots on a Saturday or Sunday this growing season simply because I want to avoid any confrontation with them, whereas before I used to love the weekend banter

But why should I have to take such actions? its shouldn't be necessary.

Personally I think it is an ageism thing! i.e I am too old and should be put down.

I could go on and give you lots more reasons but why should I bore you! you good people with my problems......Tg





sparrow

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #6 on: July 30, 2015, 15:54:20 »
Can't offer anything but sympathy, but sending much of that from my corner. I'd wait to see what happens. Am assuming he's either told you he's lodged a complaint or the Sec has told you. In either case I'd put my side calmly and make sure I had photos I could send to back it up. Hope it can get resolved with as little pain/angst as possible.

I got sent to Coventry by some for 4 months for cutting a blackthorn hedge on my boundary from 20ft+ to 6ft. It's now more bushy and loaded with fruit for the birds and others have said it was a really good idea. Plus I now get sunlight on the plot from September to March. I kept saying to myself I'm doing this for the learning about veggies, not to belong to a club, though the banter was nice. I don't trust 'em not to change with the wind now & that helps me keep my distance.

PS Allotment cat lay on my onions. Little beggar!

Ellen K

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #7 on: July 30, 2015, 16:39:35 »
A couple of years ago, my neighbour said he'd complained to the council about me - I got sick of him coming on to my plot, destroying stuff, etc so after many requests that he keep off my garden, I put up a rope at knee height along the boundary to remind him where it was.  He got quite nasty and said the council would be sending me a letter blah blah blah.  I think he was trying to scare me, but I said I was comfortable with whatever he decided to do and that would wait for the council's letter before I did anything.

Of course there was no letter, it was all BS.  The point is, we've all got stories like this, it is always going to happen when you get a diverse group of people with dare I say it some time on their hands and forced to be neighbours.  If you speak at all, just say that you keep to your garden and only ask that others do the same.

Digeroo

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #8 on: July 30, 2015, 16:43:22 »
Oh no he certainly did not tell me he was complaining.  I cannot get a polite word out of him, so have taken to avoiding him. I have two half plots and normally move to the other side if I see him. I am normally earlier or later than most so generally see very few people.

I have not spoken to him in over a year.   

johhnyco15

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #9 on: July 30, 2015, 17:07:55 »
just stand firm {but not on his onions lol} some people just want to cause trouble ignour him and all those who give out funny looks and keep doing what you love growing your own  and tee gee again keep doing what you love dont be bullied into giving up you both grow some amazing stuff be proud and chin up dont let the b********* get you down
johhnyc015  may the plot be with you

Digeroo

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #10 on: July 30, 2015, 18:25:28 »
Many thanks Johhny I was beginning to think of giving up. 

The runner beans are just beginning to flower and produce beans.  And the autumn raspberries are really big.

bluecar

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #11 on: July 30, 2015, 19:58:23 »
Tg.

I can not believe how you are being victimised by other people on your plot. We all know how supportive you are, of us all with our various queries and of your extensive knowledge (the almanac is brilliant). Your photographs give us great pleasure and I'm sure you also delight in taking them. There must be other plot holders on site that you can turn to for support.
Do not give up.
Are there any A4A members close to Huddersfield that can give more than the moral support that I can give.
Best wishes Tg

Bluecar

Tee Gee

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #12 on: July 30, 2015, 21:07:58 »
Quote
There must be other plot holders on site that you can turn to for support

tee gee again keep doing what you love dont be bullied into giving up you both grow some amazing stuff be proud and chin up dont let the b********* get you down

Thanks guys for your kind comments.

I am not actually being victimised or bullied more a case of being ignored by the clique in the plots next to mine,

It is this that annoys me most considering the plots they are on were once mine and I went onto cultivate two wildernesses after I gave up these plots to them.

There are other people on the plots I get on quite well with but I don't see them often as they come down at the same time as the clique I try to avoid.

So it is the banter and social aspect of the plots I am missing, it was always brilliant in the past but sadly most of the people I associated with then have died,leaving space for the current lot who either don't want to talk,don't have the time to talk, or if they do they are asking for something for nothing.

Yes Johnny I question there parentage too!

If I could find a hobby that is as therapeutic as allotmenteering then. I wouldn't hesitate in giving up.

I know I have my online involvement with my website and photography but that is not quite the same, I tend to leave that for the winter months when I cannot get on the plot.

Knowing me I will get over this situation somehow but I can't ever see me getting the enjoyment out of my plots I once did.

So once again guys thanks for you kind thoughts....Tg
« Last Edit: July 30, 2015, 21:12:34 by Tee Gee »

pumkinlover

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #13 on: July 31, 2015, 08:45:27 »
I sympathise with you both for the problems that you are experiencing.
There are many wise word been written in response.
In the end you are only responsible for your actions so when you have done nothing wrong, hold your head up and let them get on with it.  Enjoy your plot and leave them to it.
Best wishes to both of you.

galina

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #14 on: July 31, 2015, 10:00:31 »
Join the club!

I am seriously thinking of leaving my plot as I feel as I have been sent to Coventry.......Tg

Don't give up please!  You have every right to be there and to enjoy and do things your way. 

Yes, other people do things differently and that is just normal. I remember listening to and watching the experienced gardeners on our first allotment and then doing things differently - not to frustrate them, but to find my own (organic) way.  Maybe I have upset some inadvertently by doing things differently from what they advised. 

Sorry you are feeling so isolated there.  Not just an 'age' thing.  But, have you ever considered people might be envious?  Plain and simple?  Nothing to do with you.  The success of your crops shows what a great gardener you are.  And everybody can see that.  And this may be why it is that they appear to 'clique' against you.

Enjoy your successes and perhaps comment on theirs too, by way of an icebreaker.  Because praise from 'teacher' (if deserved) will go down well and hopefully change the dynamic of the relations.  Of course if some people are really bringing the order of the site down with littering and bad behaviour and taking advantage, that is another matter.   So sorry to hear about your struggles TeeGee.  Don't let it get you down, please.      :wave:


Borlotti

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #15 on: July 31, 2015, 11:20:11 »
Such a shame, the allotment for me is the people, luckily I have great allotment neighbours.  We have new people on the plot but all seem very nice and enthusiastic. I would not like to go up there if people weren't friendly to me.  We have 2 allotment Secretaries (they share the job), and both are doing a good job, and they just liaise with the Council and show people vacant plots. I miss some of the old timers who gave me so much help when I was a newcomer, and also shared their produce.  Last year I could give some away, but this year nothing.  Keep smiling and don't give up.

Obelixx

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #16 on: July 31, 2015, 15:25:29 »
Digeroo - just sit it out an dpeople will eventually realise the onion man is a stirrer and malcontent who is best ignored.

TeeGee - I think you should carry on and just ignore the yuppy element and still see your mates.   You grow amazing stuff and are always happy to share your knowledge so I think you should carry on regardless and do what makes you happy.
Obxx - Vendée France

Deb P

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #17 on: July 31, 2015, 15:52:51 »
I think these cycles of falling out with people/committee members is endemic everywhere. I have only had a plot since 2006, but have seen many situations as you are describing.......and as a wise fellow plotholder said to me recently, committee's and their members come and they go....eventually! All I want as a plotholder is to have a sensible and reasonable set of rules/byelaws that are fair and consistently applied to everyone, but as we are seeing on this thread some folk seem to thrive on conflict!

I find I garden alone more and more now, I like going to my plot early in the morning or late in the evening so don't see as many people as I used to, ? a blessing or a curse as I also used to enjoy the social interaction. I'm sorry to hear of the petty squabbles going on, but it appears this is endemic in lottie life now sadly.......
If it's not pouring with rain, I'm either in the garden or at the lottie! Probably still there in the rain as well TBH....🥴

http://www.littleoverlaneallotments.org.uk

Tee Gee

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Re: Rant and Need advice
« Reply #18 on: July 31, 2015, 16:36:29 »
Hi all,

Thanks for all your encouraging words!

I went down to the plots with a bit of trepidation as I sure as hell didn't want to go.

Anyhow I went!

Lo and behold a couple on the top plot who I don't see so often simply because they are at the top of the plots, asked how I was? so I just told them what I felt warts and all, and their reply was similar to all the comments I have received here on A4A.

So I got on with what I had to do and as I finished and was leaving the plots I met the guy who cultivated the plot by the exit gate and lo and behold his comments were similar.

As our chat went on he told me he was off to the hospital for his daily treatment and I asked what for:

Cancer!

Well that put my troubles into perspective so I went home feeling a bit better.

When I got home I made myself a coffee and sat out on the patio and this is what I saw in front of me;



Then on looking to the left side of me I saw this:



and to the right I saw this;



This made me feel much better so I had a look around and took one or two more pictures as you can see here;

a few of my Alstroemeria;



Next I had a look at the front garden;



the island bed;



then a floral border;



one of my new Pinks it is named Doris.



as I photographed Doris I saw these Viola I grew from seed that I bought in a Pound Shop;



then as I went and sat down and picked up my unfinished coffee I saw this Zantedeschia which some people refer to as the Peace Lily so it was then I felt a load go off my mind.



So once again thank you  for your backing during a rather dark period of my life!

Hopefully I can take all your suggestions on board and forget the few people in my life that I simply don't like and get on with my life as if they didn't exist.

It will be difficult but I will try

So thanks one and all....Tg  :coffee2:







 

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